Elijah
Heaven turns to Hell. Good turns to bad. Sweet turns to sour. Despite our corrupted present, who's to say it'll all end well.
I sighed and flipped the page. My pen glided across the clean page of lined paper.
What if I could float amongst the stars?
Maybe say hi to my mom if she isn't too far.
Tell her how unprepared I truly am.
And how I wish she'd told me, life's a scam.
Sing a note or two about an ocean or waterfall.
Listen to her lecture about being brave and standing tall.
I shook my head and flipped to the next page, scribbling down more useless stuff.
We're only hopeless in comparison to the hopeful.
Only dying in comparison to the living.
Only fearful in comparison to the fearless.
Only depressed in comparison to the happy.
Only lonely in comparison to the crowded.
Yet it hurts all the same. Day in and day out nothing truly erases the pain. So we mask it. And walked with our chest out like we've got confidence in our shoes, like we've got nothing to lose.
I groaned in frustration.
Why does everything I write suck?
I've been attempting to put the song book Carter brought me to use all morning but I'm just not any good. Page after page begins with an abrupt intro and an uneasy finish. My thoughts won't form anything remotely decent enough to be called a song. Just because I can sing a song doesn't mean I can write one.
Clearly.
I tossed the book to the bottom of my bed and fell back, my eyes drifting to the ceiling.
I let out a deep sigh, drowning in my heavy heart.
I closed my eyes and the sound of Lewis Capaldi's voice filled up the space around me.
And I sang with him. "Now the day bleeds, into nightfall. And you're not here to get me through it all. I let me guard down, and then you pulled the rug. I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved."
I wish I knew how to write lyrics like Lewis. Raw and powerful.
He moves people with his music.
I wish I could make music that moves people.
I shot up suddenly as my phone started ringing. It was Carter, I knew because Ocean Breeze by Surfaces was blasting out of it.
I rushed to the device like my ass was on fire. "Hello?"
"Goodmorning beautiful."
I smiled lightly. It was actually twelve in the afternoon but I didn't say anything because he called me beautiful and my silly heart was doing random skips.
