Deal With The Pain | Namgi

Chapter 16

"Here you go." I smile sweetly to the young girl on the other side of the counter, giving her the pink frosted cupcake she'd wanted.

It's been a few days now since Jimin asked me to be his boyfriend, and he's been the sweetest thing ever since. He spends all his free time here, including doing homework and studying here. Even when he's working, he's still sweet with me. With light kisses on the cheek and small flirting here and there, and then the hugs and compliments, the other three boys have already figured out what's going on between us and are happy for us. I've been quite happier honestly too, still trying to get used to the amount of affection being thrown my way.

Hearing the front door open, I glance towards it to find who my next customer could be. Though, I'm taken completely aback when I realize who it is.

"What do you think you're doing here?" Jimin growls at the taller male, stepping to my side and wrapping an arm around my waist. I don't move or say anything though, too frozen in surprise and worry to be able to do anything yet.

He looks different. He doesn't look anything like the last time he came here. There's no cigarette stuck between his lips, he's dressed in regular clothes. He... he looks person I remember him being. He finally looks like my best friend.

And I truthfully don't know how to feel about it. How to handle that.

"I'm sorry for all the problems I've caused in the past, I just... I just wanna talk with Yoongi hyung and apologize." Namjoon says quietly, though his eyes for some reason attach their gaze to Jimin's hand that's currently around my waist. I bite my lip at everything happening around me, unsure of what to feel or think about all of it.

"And why should we believe you after all of the trouble you've caused every time you come here? Every single time you've came for the last couple years now?" Jimin counters in a snarky tone, pulling me into his side.

"Please, I-I just wanna apologize and talk to Yoongi. I-I know I don't deserve it after all the problems I've caused, but I wanna make things right and I want to apologize." Joon says softly, gaze still on Jimin's hand.

Jimin sighs, looking over to me, effectively putting me on the spot. I bite my lip as I glance to the younger of the two, seeing the worry and care in his eyes, before glancing at Joon.

"Okay. We can talk. Come back here." I manage to speak quietly, motioning with my head for him to come to the other side of the counter. I look back over to Jimin, to my boyfriend, and my heart sinks and clenches at the fear that forms in his eyes at my acceptance.

"Yoongi, are you sure about this?" Jimin asks, and I know he's afraid about more than just how the conversation is bound to go with Namjoon.

He's afraid to lose me already.

It makes me a combination of angry and sad towards the younger, knowing he promised it wouldn't be an issue if I ever decided to choose Joon over him. I can't say that I don't feel something for this boy that's still got his arm wrapped protectively around my waist though. There's something for him there, even if there's something for Namjoon as well.

"It's gonna be okay, baby. I promise." I murmur softly before leaning in and pecking his lips slowly, hoping to reassure him that there won't be anything happening with Namjoon. Not yet, for sure.

As much as I wish I could run back to Joon and act like everything's okay and that nothing happened, I know I can't. All of the things all these years have hurt me, and I can't just let it all go because he's suddenly decided out of nowhere to come back to me. I'm happy with Jimin, feeling better than I have for some time now. And quite frankly, even if Joon confessed today as soon as the two of us head in back to talk, I don't think for a second that I'd go running into his arms and telling him that I've felt the same for so long. He's hurt me a lot, and while I'm willing to forgive, I can't just heal that quickly.

I can't heal all of that pain and hesitation that he's caused me.

The worry that I'll never truly be good enough for anyone, a worry that Jimin's successfully tucked away from me since that very first date he took me on.

Pulling away from Jimin gently, there's a small shy smile on his soft lips as he gazes at me.

"Okay. Just don't be too long, you know how busy things can get in the blink of an eye." Jimin mumbles quietly.