Before You

Chapter 13

Shocked. That is what I'm feeling. "What are you doing here?"
"I needed to make sure you're okay."
"I'm fine really."
"Oh, okay." He stands there and just stares at me searching my face for answers to questions he hasn't asked yet. I quietly ask "would you like to come in?" And step to the side so he can enter.
He walks in and sits on the edge of my bed.
"Are you going to tell me the real reason you're so upset?"
Without making contact with his eyes I say "it doesn't matter. Just forget it happened."
"I can't forget while you're standing there with a tear stained face. Why can't you tell me?" Getting frustrated I push back with agitation,
"Pressing me for answers isn't going to help either."
He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs. "Are you always this difficult?"
"Look, I don't know what makes you think you can come to my hotel room with an interrogation. Quite frankly, you disliked me from the start. Why are you here?"
"Like I said... to check on you."
My heart about stops. Maybe Annie is right. Maybe he is attracted me.
I put my hair behind my ear and look down. Eli got up from the bed and walked over to where I'm standing and puts his hand under my chin. I look him in the eyes knowing my expression is nervous. He searches my eyes and quietly asks "what happened to you?"
Nervous about being judged I say "I don't know where to start..."
"How about from the beginning?" I walk to the top of my bed and grab a pillow to hold and sit down. He watches me very carefully and sits back where he was earlier. He stays quiet for a moment so I can tell him.
I don't know why, but I feel comfortable telling him.
"It all started at the beginning of spring in NYC. My best friend Annie and I were taking the city by storm. We left the small town in Seattle to start over. I wanted to be some big song writer and musician." I said with a light laugh. "I had broken up with my boyfriend of 6 years just before moving. It didn't end well. I started receiving hate mail at the studio and weird voicemails from blocked numbers. Annie told me not to worry about it and I tried to just roll it off. I mean, I'm in NYC! I should be living the best life I could." I take a couple of breaths.
"On June 29th Annie and I were invited to a party. It was a big bash with all of friends from the studio. It was something everyone was excited for. Well, I'm not the kind of person to let someone walk me home that I just met or anything. This guy, Damien, asked me to dance. He was such a gentleman at first. We had a great time. I walked out of the party to go to my car. Annie already left with her boyfriend Jonathan so I was going to leave by myself. Damien followed me home and I was fighting him off and got pretty messed up in the mix. Someone heard and called the police. It turns out my ex boyfriend was so mad he had paid someone to mess with me and hurt me because I left him." I start to tear up. "I didn't think someone could be so cruel and from that day on, I've been super aware and needed to focus on me and get through the damage. Damien was charged and my ex, Ryan, was charged too. Ever since I've just been terrified."
I look at Eli and see the anger in his eyes and don't know what else to say. He's just completely silent.