Love is All That I Fear- Enoch O'Connor X Reader

Chapter 14- Learning

Enoch's POV

"How do you know who Y/N is?" I asked Heather.

"I saw her," she said, wiping away the tears from her face.

"Where did you see her?" I asked.

"In one of my visions," she replied.

"How do you know about what happened at the beach?" I questioned, scared she would know that I've cut myself.

"I had a vision of it, you went to sleep crying, and she healed you, and then you were happy."

I smiled remembering Y/N. I loved her with all my heart, she was the first person to try and befriend me.

"Heather, go to sleep," I said.

"Nochy, can I sleep in here with you again?"

"Of course, Doll. Now go lie down, I'll be there in a minute."

I put away the stuff I was using to make my homunculus, then went to the bathroom and washed my hands. By the time I was back in my room, Heather was asleep on my bed. I carefully got in bed next to the small girl, and wrapped my arms around her. Her face nuzzled up against my chest, and I let out a soft laugh.

I felt nothing like my old self, but at the same time, I felt like nothing changed. I was still cutting, and I still cried almost every day. But Y/N was gone, and I felt broken without the love of my life. It sometimes feels like it won't ever get better, that she'll move on, find someone better than me. But then I think about all the good things happening to me. I have Daniel and Finn as my new friends, and I had Heather, who I basically treated like my own child. She was so small and innocent, and I felt the need to protect her at all costs.

I pull her even closer to me before closing my eyes, and eventually falling asleep.

* * *

When I woke up in the morning, I saw Heather still asleep. I roll her off of me and get out of bed. I grab a pair of clothes and go into the bathroom. I change my clothes and fix my hair before quietly walking back into my room. When I got in there, I see Heather sitting up in my bed.

"Hi," she says, rubbing her eyes.

"Good morning, Doll. How'd you sleep?" I asked.

"Good," she said, getting out of the bed.

She walked over to me, and I bent down and gave her a hug. After that, she walked out of my room. I remembered that Finn wanted me to meet him at the back of the house around noon, so I have about 3 hours. I sit down at my desk and open the drawer. I pull out the piece of paper that Y/N had wrote as a diary. I read it over again, and smile.

Dear Diary,
I still like him. No matter how hard I try to hate him, I just can't.  Even though he's constantly sarcastic, and overall a terrible person, I feel like he could be nice.  I know this may sound sappy, but maybe I could be the one to finally make him happy.
-Y/N       17/5/63

The thing was, she was the person to make me happy. She helped me see that I didn't have to live my life hating myself, that I could move on. Maybe that's what I had to do with her. I love her, and I will for the rest of my life, but maybe I had to move on. I have my friends who make me happy, just as happy as she did.

I put the piece of paper back in the drawer, and make my way to breakfast. When I got there, there were already a few people sitting down. I sit next to Daniel, who is across the table from Finn. We were planning on sneaking out together, so it would be best if we weren't seen together. When we make eye contact, he gives me a small head nod. I give him one back, and start eating.