My Own Worst Enemy

Be More Careful

Gracie groaned and opened her eyes as Elliott started to wail uncontrollably.

"C'mere, baby boy," she sighed and gently picked up her son. "I love you," she smiled, feeding him dutifully. As he ate, she checked her phone and her heart stopped as she saw her instagram notifications.

MarilynConejo wants to send you a message.

This couldn't be good. She checked her messages to see if Christian had sent her anything. To see if he was okay... anything. This was the same woman he had been seen traipsing with for the months leading up to their reunion.  Maybe she blindsided him and he would text to warn her...

And nothing. Nothing beyond the angry message he sent after she posted pictures of their son.

After taking a deep breath and grounding herself in the soft suckles coming from her son, she opened the message and her heart broke.

It was of Christian at a club... it was unmistakably him... and he was holding the tiny model on his lap, kissing her roughly with his fingers tangled in her hair.

It wasn't an accidental kiss. He didn't pull her off... the video continued to Christian kissing down the model's neck and to her ample (and clearly fake) breasts, but she couldn't watch anymore.

She felt like she was going to throw up. God she was so naïve. You can't teach an old dog new tricks. She couldn't expect Christian to actually love her. Couldn't expect him to care.

Without thinking, she sent a text to Christian. It was probably too long, and he definitely wouldn't care, but she needed to say it. She couldn't have her son fall in love with his dad, just for him to leave.

Don't look for me. Don't look for us. Keep having fun with Marilyn. Live your best life. Don't send us money, and don't text me. I think a clean cutoff is important here. I don't want to tie you down to a life you're not ready for. Just be more careful with your "I love you"s with the next girl. You have a way of making anyone believe it, and it isn't fair to them. I hate you, Christian Yelich.

The last part wasn't true. She loved him. That's why it hurt so badly. She loved him so much... her son loves him.

She'd been played like a fiddle, and now had 24 hours to get out of his apartment. She couldn't be here when he got back. She couldn't see him; she wouldn't be strong enough to stand her ground. She'd fall right back in love.

Gracie held her boy close that night, barely getting an hour of sleep. She watched Elliott breathing, took in his features. The perfect baby boy...

She couldn't believe she fucked him up so badly already.

***

Grace was exhausted. She had moved her whole life back to Minnesota on 3 hours of sleep, a week after giving birth.

She was tired, in pain, and emotionally spent. She had spent too many hours crying over Christian... he didn't matter anymore. He couldn't matter anymore.

Christian Calling.

She'd declined his previous calls, in fear that he'd manipulate her into staying in Wisconsin. But now that she was in Minnesota...

Despite her better judgement, she accepted the call. She didn't say anything, just staying silent on the line.

She could hear his shaky breathing. The sniffles. He'd been crying.

Oh well. Should've thought of that.

"Grace," he whispered, his voice thick with sorrow. He'd be home by now. He'd see the empty apartment.

"What, Christian?" Grace snapped, her hands shaking as she sat on her new couch.

"Come home, please. Let's talk about it. I'm sorry," Christian pleaded. Grace rolled her eyes, encouraging Elliott to latch. She didn't have time for this. She didn't have time to give him hope.

"There is nothing to talk about. You were with another woman, mere hours after telling me you loved me. Hours after leaving me. Leaving your son," Gracie snapped, her anger causing Elliott to whine.

"Gracie I do love you. I love you both so much," he pleaded, his heart shattering as he heard his son on the other line.

"You don't. If you loved us, you wouldn't have been so quick to leave us. You wouldn't have been so excited to fuck another woman," she laughed dryly. "He deserves better. He deserves parents that are going to be 100% there for him. We could've worked with your work schedule. We can't work with you leaving us like that. Treating us like we mean nothing."

There was silence on the other line. Selfishly, Gracie hoped it hurt. She hoped it felt like daggers to the heart.

"I'm so sorry, Gracie. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm so, so sorry," her heart softened at the pain. She loves him. She couldn't stand to hear him in pain like this.

"Why? Why did you do it? Why hurt me again?" Gracie sniffled, tears rolling down her cheeks. The anger had disappeared. She was in a world of pain. She felt used and disposable.

"Oh, Grace," he whispered on the other line. "I have no good answer. It won't happen again. Please... come home."

Gracie thought for a second and looked down at her son, the cold wall crashing back down. She had to be strong for him. She couldn't let him get hurt.

"No. Home is here. Home isn't with you anymore. Please don't call me again. Go back to her. Live your MVP life," Gracie said, no emotion in her voice. It would be better to shut down than it would be to feel.

She needed to be strong for Elliot. She was all he had... and he was all she had.

No more Christian. No more pain.

No more love. Love wasn't real