Missing Pieces

Chapter#11: Strange Morning

I went for the class, even though I didn't want to. Everything was just like before. Just as usual, I was at my corner seat, looking out of the window, again. It seems like nothing had changed. He was the same, classroom was the same, and we were strangers, again. Difference was just that before, I had a hope that I'll talk to him someday, now, there was just something broken inside me. I had a hope that someday he'll come back.
Once again, I restricted myself from looking at him. And he also didn't look at me, or he did, I don't know, I didn't notice. To be honest, the situation was the same as it was a month before. A month with him spent in a glimpse. The test was also near, I was scared. By God, I was scared that will I ever see him again in my life after the end of Session?
I wanted to look at him, just like I used to do before. I couldn't. Now I was waiting for the practice class so I would look at him quietly and he wouldn't know ever. My love was silent again. But this time, he knew it. Don't know if he believed it or not. But I do, and I'll prove it someday.
Just as he stepped into the class, my heart started skipping beats, breaths got missing somewhere, and I got an anxiety attack, again.
I couldn't control now, I gave him a constant stare for 20 seconds. I signed his attendance too. I don't know what he did to it, but he looked at me after this. At least, he looked at me. We made an eye contact once. Just once. But I think, just looking at him was a cure to me. I felt better. It wasn't much hard to face him as I thought. I went to bathroom and cried for a minute or two, washed my face and came back to the class. My heart wasn't heavy anymore. I was feeling much better than before. It was a tough day. I felt like he's playing hard-to-get. I still had a chance to save the friendship. Let's see, what happens. I have a lot of questions in me and a hope to find all the answers one day.