Winter's End [winter soldier//Bucky Barnes AU]

Chaper Twenty Five

*Sarah's POV*

The shot came from the left, the bullet leaving the gun in almost slow motion as it headed for it's target.

Peter never saw it coming.

It embedded itself into his chest with a solid thump. He grunted, surprised, and crumpled to his knees in a heap. I opened my mouth and let out a desperate cry, pushing through the team and rushing to reach him. The world was moving in slow motion; I couldn't hear the birds chirping, I couldn't see the sun setting. All I could hear was Peter's gut-wrenching cry of agony, and watch as blood flowed from the open wound.

My heart pounded in my chest and I grabbed his back as he kept falling, desperate to keep him sitting up, desperate to keep him alive.

Suddenly the world was going a normal speed again.

"Peter!" I shouted, grabbing his shoulders as his head rolled. He moaned in pain and looked at me with hazy eyes. Everyone else rushed around him, looking shell shocked.

"Peter no, don't give up on me! You'll be ok just hang in there!" I called to him frantically, setting him down on the ground and ripping his suit open to look at the wound. There was so much blood.

One look at the grave injury and I knew there was nothing, absolutely nothing, I could do. And it made my heart drop to the ground. He was going to die.

Peter struggled for breath, looking up blankly at the sky.

"Is..is it..bad?" He wheezed, not even looking at me. I swallowed hard, trying to figure out what to say, when Steve leaned down and put his hand on Peter's shoulder.

"It's not too bad. We can get you stitched up if we-" he started, before being cut off by Peter.

"I'm not....go-nna....make it, am.. I?" He asked weakly in short breaths. His wounded chest was hardly moving up and down when he breathed, and his breaths were small and quick. A tear finally slipped from my eye and fell on his hand, which I then clasped tightly. He was so young- too young to have seen so much evil, felt so much pain, witness so much suffering. He was too young to die.

My heart lurched at the sight of his suffering, my mind racing to find a non existent solution, refusing to believe that I couldn't do anything but watch him die.

"Peter, it's gonna be alright." Natasha whispered from above me, ignoring his question. No one wanted to admit that he was dying.

Within a minute he was lying in a pool of dark, crimson blood, that was soaking my boots and hands. His eyes were no longer moving, and his breaths were so slight I barely noticed them. I couldn't believe this was happening to him.

"It's..ok. At least...I-I can...see Gwen." He stuttered, his body shuddering as it desperately struggled to survive, struggled to work. His body didn't know that it was too late.

"Gwen..I'm...I'm...coming..." Peter whispered faintly, and then, suddenly...

He was gone.

I blinked rapidly and held my breath, placing my hand under his nose to see if he was still breathing. I felt nothing.

I closed my eyes. I breathed.

I cried. I cried. I cried.

The warmth of Bucky was my only comfort as I lay in his arms, feeling numb. My eyes were now open, but I didn't see anything, and I didn't feel anything. The cold tears fell and fell to no end on Bucky's jacket, but he didn't seem to mind.

I just didn't know how the world could be so cruel.

Peter was an innocent soul, a good hearted hero that only wanted to protect people. How was it fair that he died at only eighteen? How is it fair that he will never get married, never smile again, never laugh again?

It's not. It's not fair at all.

"Baby we have to get in the van now." Bucky whispered in my ear a minute later, interrupting my thoughts. I blinked and tried to focus my vision. But when I did, all I saw was red. It made me sick to my stomach.

Bucky gingerly took my hands and led me to the van, helping me stumble my way inside. The rest of the team followed solemnly in, silent and grieving, over the loss of a hero and friend. Bucky helped me sit down in the back of the car next to Natasha, who clasped my hand tightly and held on for dear life. I was so out of it that I didn't notice Bucky leave the car, and didn't notice that Steve took his place- I didn't notice until suddenly I realized that something was missing.

I looked up, searching for the source of emptiness, and then I realized that Bucky wasn't in sight. I frowned and stood up. Steve and Natasha tried to hold me back, but I broke through their arms and confusedly went to look for him.

I scanned the woods, searching the trees for the glint of his metal arm. And suddenly, I saw him.

He was attacking the man who killed Peter.

He swung punch after punch, letting out cries of anger as he bludgeoned the Hydra agent to death; every now and then he glanced at Peter's body, before punching even harder.

Without thinking I sprinted towards him, running as fast as I could to stop the madness. I didn't care about him killing the bastard that ended Peter's life so much as I cared that he was turning back into the monster he used to be.

I shoved myself between them, and Bucky's face changed from anger, to surprise, to guilt, all in a matter of seconds. He stopped himself from the punch he was in the middle of and instead stepped backwards, hesitating before walking away from me and the body.

I stood and followed him. He walked with his head down, his posture sluggish and tired. He knew what he had done. And he knew that he had sunken back into his old anger for a moment. But I wasn't mad. I also wasn't scared- I simply couldn't bring myself to hate him. Not after everything we've been through, not after all the deaths we've witnessed. Life was too precious and I was too deeply in love with him.

He continued walking away from me, and I quickened my pace, catching up to him. I grabbed his shoulder and he stopped, but didn't face me. His hands covered his head.

Confused, I moved them away, and saw how close he was to tears. One slipped down his cheek, and I silently wiped it away with the side of my thumb.

"Sarah, I am so sorry, please forgi-" he started, and I interrupted him.

"Don't torture yourself. I don't care that you beat him, because he deserved it. I only stopped you so you wouldn't hurt yourself or lose your mind." I said quietly, reaching for his real and metal hand. He intertwined our fingers and his pained expression turned into a relieved one. He nodded.

"Let's go back to the van, ok?" I said, and he nodded again. We walked back to the car together.

On the way there I noticed that Peter's body wasn't on the ground anymore, meaning that they had gathered it into a body bag so he could be properly buried. I didn't know if it made me feel any better.

I sat next to Natasha again, but with Bucky on the other side of me. The car lurched forward and we drove away from the horrific place, that I would never, ever forget in a million years.

--

Minutes later we watched from miles away as Skye blew the base up. It shook the earth we stood on, even at this distance, and I swear I could feel the heat of the fire on my face. It takes an overwhelming amount of power to blow up an entire secret base, but we did it, and in doing so we pretty much shut down Hydra for good.

I should had felt relieved, but instead I felt pain, anger, guilt, emptiness. I couldn't process that we had lost Peter.

But, as we drove to Tony's house where we had started, so many months ago, I finally felt as if things would get better, and that maybe things would be okay for a little while.

--