Finding true happiness (a 5sos fanfiction)

Chapter 4: Waterfight

I grabbed my black bikini and threw some ripped shorts on. I found my younger bothers water gun and filled it with freezing water. Hehe I can't wait to see their reactions. I walked towards Luke's house, shit I forgot something to cover my scars. 'Shitballs!' I whispered to myself. It was too late to turn around now though. I'll just make sure not to get over excited and throw my arms in the air.

I saw the boys in only swim shorts. Holy fuck they were hot! Especially Michael, I could look at that body all day. All the sudden I was squirted with freezing cold water. 'YOU ASSHOLES!' I screamed. They just burst out laughing and ran off to go hide. I laughed and ran off to find the little shits. I found Calum first hiding behind a tree, 'Agh it's so cold!' Calum squealed like a ten year old girl. 'Its called payback my dear', I laughed. Then I was bombarded with cold water. Luke and Ash squirted me about a million times and Calum joined in. They burst into laughter as I stood there soaking wet. 'Hey where's Mike?' Ash asked. I walked off to go look for him while the other guys went off to get drinks.

I walked to the end of the garden then someone pulled me into the bushes. 'Agh!' I squealed and I looked up and saw those gorgeous green eyes, Michael. 'Just saying you look hot in that bikini', he smirked and biting on his lip.

I was so turned on.

'T...thanks', I giggled nervously and looked to the floor. Michael lifted my chin up and looked into my eyes. 'You also have very beautiful eyes', I could feel my face burning up. His hands moved to my hips and he leaned in and closed his eyes. I copied him and our lips touched. We were in this position for a while. His lips felt so good. When we broke away he smiled and he was blushing. 'Aww', I cooed. He laughed and then he looked at my wrists 'What's that?'

'NOTHING', I shouted. I felt my eyes brim with tears and I walked away.

'Hey where you goin?' Calum shouted after me. 'Home, bye boys'. I started crying as I walked home and I could hear faint shouts from Michael. 'Florence wait, please...' I ignored it and carried on home.

I ran into my room and burst out in tears. I fucked up, I fucked up, I fucked up, the evil voice in my head whispered to me. I kissed him, he might of liked me! Now he probably hates me and thinks I'm a wrist slitting emo. God I hate myself, why am I still alive! Why didn't those fucking pills work! I cried myself to sleep. Ignoring all Michaels texts and calls. I wanted to answer but I couldn't face what he had to say.

What is wrong with me? Why am I so awkward? Michael and I could work out. But instead I have to be depressed. I got a text from Chloe;

Chloe: Guess what! Me and the girls are gonna visit you in a couple weeks!

I smiled, I need my friends. Maybe I should tell them about my depression? Maybe I should tell them about my suicide attempts? They would understand, wouldn't they?

Nah...