Repressed (Wattys 2014 Winner)

Chapter 21

He thrust his fingers in and out of me, I bit my lip in frustration and pain. I couldn’t believe what was happening. Adrian was raping me…this wasn’t consensual. This was abuse. This was exactly what I had run away from, one year ago.

I felt Adrian’s tongue flick over my core and I gasped, “No!” But his mouth was on me, hot and bothered. He stroked my core slowly and then picked up the pace, I could feel my stomach clenching in anticipation. I arched my back, I was unable to control my body, Adrian’s thumbs, pulled at my nipples, “Do you like this?” He whispered as he kissed me again between my legs, sucking and biting it till I cried, “Fuck me, just fuck me and get it over with, Adrian!”

“You know, this time, I will not disagree with you, even though the last time I called you a cheap whore. This time, I will take advantage of you, baby doll.” And with that he thrust into me, I hadn’t even realized when he had taken his boxers off. He was inside of me, I gasped in pain as I remembered how big Adrian’s dick was, he filled me, completely.

He moved slowly and then picked up the pace, I bit my lip, and closed my eyes, I felt another slap hit my stomach, “Open your eyes!” Adrian shouted at me, I flinched and opened them. They were full of tears, I could barely see his outline. But when I did, I did see a flash of pain in his eyes too, but they were quickly replaced by something sinister.

He thrust harder without warning and I screamed again, “Scream as much as you want, Milania, nobody will hear you. We are on the top floor, remember? Total seclusion.” I narrowed my eyes at him and replied, “Fuck you.”

“I am fucking you right now.” Adrian grinned. The irony of the situation wasn’t lost on either of us. “You are so tight.”

He thrust harder and massaged my core, it was all building up till I finally found release, I arched my back and my bare nipples met his mouth, his arm sliding behind my back keeping that arch in place as he sucked hard and then softly, moaning and chanting my name like a prayer.

I moaned softly, and I heard him say, “Just like that, baby. Find your release with me.”
But what I found was shame and guilt.

What is happening to me?

“Adrian, please. Don’t.” I cried out to him, I felt his cold, hard gaze on me, “I wish you loved me instead of him. Wish I was your man, not him.” He pursed his lips into a thin tight line and then left the bedroom. My body tingled with the orgasm, but I didn’t feel good, I felt disgusted.

I was still shackled and spread out for Adrian to see. The pain, shame and degradation slowly seeped into my system. I became numb, this was torment of the highest degree and I, I was helpless.

I heard the door slam and I flinched, Adrian had left. I let out my pent up pain as I howled in the empty apartment, hoping that somebody, anybody, everybody would hear my plight and help me out of this hellhole.

I cried myself to sleep, still quivering in fear, I dreaded the moment when Adrian would return. As he most certainly would try to finish what he had started. We would finish me.

A loud bang woke me up from my troubled slumber, “Who’s there?” I shouted out. I was still restrained. And from what I could figure, Adrian probably had not come back home.

“Adrian?” The voice called out, it was a man’s. Oh no. I was still naked and bare to the sights, but I still had to make my presence known, “HELP ME!” I heard heavy and fast footsteps and the door slammed open, it was Shane.

“Milla!” He shouted at me and when he observed my state, he immediately looked away, “Did Adrian do this to you?” He barely whispered now. I nodded in silence hoping that he would see my reply. Shane exhaled and came to the side tables where Adrian had left the keys, he kept his eyes firmly averted from my body and reached out to unlock the shackles. “Shane, look at me, it’s okay, just please do it fast!” I cried out. Shane gulped and I could feel his fingers trembling as he undid the spreader bar, setting my ankles free of its violation, I reached out and hugged Shane, his cool leather jacket stung my sensitive skin, “Oh thank you!”

“Please, don’t. I feel so sorry for what I did,” Shane croaked, he went to Adrian’s closet and threw me a t-shirt, “Please, cover yourself up.”

I pulled it on and got up, almost falling down again, but Shane held me up, “Did…did Adrian rape you?” He fumbled with his question.

I gave him a painful smile, “Yes.” I whispered.

“Oh God!” He slapped his forehead and fell to the ground, “Milla, I am so, so sorry! I didn’t know he would do this to you.” Shane reached out for me but I pulled back.

“’Do this to me?’ Wait, are you the one who brought me here? I thought Adrian brought me here?” I said with confusion as my lips faltered at the sides, my eyebrows were raised.

“No,” he whispered, “I brought you here.”

I felt my pulse quicken as the chips were beginning to fall in place, “You? You brought me here?”

“Yes,” he got up took my hand forcefully and dragged me out to the hallway, he motioned with his finger to sit down and I did as I was told, he sat across me, keeping a safe distance with me, “I brought you here, but I swear to God it wasn’t my fault!”

“You brought me here! Are you insane?” I scrambled to my feet and slapped him straight across the face, “You brought me here when I had passed out in the hospital, didn’t you? Oh my God! And to think, you were a decent man!” Shane rubbed the part of his face where my palm had connected to. It was slowly turning red, the finger marks were etched.

“I didn’t know that he was a monster. I can’t apologize as it wouldn’t mean much, but seeing this, seeing you this way, today….it wrenched my heart outta’ my chest. I want to repent.”

“Oh really how?” I asked him.

“I will help you escape but give me a few more days to think how. I need time…are you willing to give me that?” I searched his eyes for any ulterior motive but I was surprised to find nothing but the truth and pain in them.

“Yes, help me out! Take me from here and maybe, God will forgive you for what you have done.” I said coldly.

“Trust me, okay? From now on, you will have to trust me.” Shane said with a weak smile. I scowled at him and snarled, “TRUST!? WHO!? MY ABDUCTOR! You need to prove it buddy, you want my trust, show me that you mean your words.”

“I will, just give me time to think of a strategy, Milania.” He pushed his temples, groaning, “God, will never forgive me for this.”

“You said Adrian threatened you. In what way?” I asked. My heart ached, even though Shane was a culprit, I still couldn’t put all of it on him, not when I knew the limits Adrian would go to in order to possess me again. It was nerve-wracking and heart breaking. Shane looked at me and gave me a soft smile, “He threatened to bring me to the streets, strip me off all the money, possessions, etc. etc. I had.”

“Are you serious?” I asked him, Shane arched his eyebrows, “Milania, I don’t even know you, why in fuck’s sake would I want to cage you in this place? He was threatening me, just like he was threatening the others.”

“Others? Who?” I snapped, I was getting impatient and annoyed, the lengths to which Adrian would go in order to find me was shocking.

“Look, Milla, Adrian had employed spotters, like me. Spotters, in hotels all over the world. We were told that if we saw a woman remotely close enough in appearance to you, we were to abduct her and bring her here, to Adrian. We all were given various pictures of you in order to make sure we had the right person.” Shane flushed, he got up from his seat and went to the kitchen. I followed him. He grabbed a glass and poured himself some coke. He climbed and sat on the slab, I was standing at the threshold with my arms firmly crossed over my chest, “But…what I don’t understand is…did he threaten everybody?”

Shane shook his head and looked away, “Just me.” He sighed deeply, he pulled out his phone and began to check his messages. I stomped, Shane looked up, “What?”

“Why would Adrian threaten you?”

“Because, I am his best friend.” Shane said.

It was a blow that took me by force, I stumbled in my position, almost falling to the ground but surprisingly I managed to grab the doorknob and hoisted myself up. Shane, was Adrian’s best friend. And yet, here he was trying to help me rather than rape me. He was going to help me escape. But was he, really going to help me?

It was a question, I had to ponder upon.