Repressed (Wattys 2014 Winner)

Chapter 22

Pasha stared up at Adrian’s furious stance, he was pissed, royally pissed. And if his dishevelled hair and undone tie was anything to go by…Adrian sure did have a rough night. She clicked her tongue, and examined her newly manicured French nails, her diamond engagement ring glittering under the white light. She smiled to herself, she would be getting married to the man of her dreams and yet here, her boss was sulking over someone who dumped his sorry ass one year ago.

“What is wrong with you?” Pasha asked him, she got up from the chair she was sitting on and tottered towards him. She pulled him by his coat lapels towards her and undid his messy tie, Adrian gulped, “I love her, and what I did last night…oh God!” He ran his hands through his hair, exasperated.

Pasha continued knotting his tie, “Well…spit it out, what did you do?” Once done, she stepped away from him and took a step back making sure his tie was proper.

“I raped her.” Adrian confessed.

Pasha was mortified, “You did what?”

“I raped her, oh God, Pasha, what shall I do?” Adrian collapsed on his chair, the contact causing a large boom to echo out in the cabin.  Pasha reached out and slapped him, her own eyes were filled with tears. Adrian was a good man, she had been working with him for quite some time now. And she was also aware about how passionate he was as a lover. But he raping a girl, especially a girl like Milania, was something she had never expected him to do. She wasn’t angry, she was disappointed, “Of all the things you could have done with her and to her, you decided to choose the one most damaging to the psyche.” Pasha grieved.

Adrian ran his hands over the sting, “Pasha I do not appreciate this.”

“FUCK YOUR APPRECIATION. HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO HER?” Pasha screamed. She had lost it. This wasn’t something she was going to let go easily, she had seen a lot of fuckery, but this one really took the cake.

“I just did.”

“’You just did!’” Pasha mocked his tone, “Merde, you…putain!” She spat out, “I have seen you do some nasty shit in the past Adrian, but this…my…my…you really have outdone yourself this time, putain!”

“It’s not like I wished for this to happen, oh God!” Adrian slammed his curled fists on his desk, Pasha flinched, as Adrian continued “I didn’t want to rape her. But I am waiting for her love. I want her body, but she is not giving in to me. I am fighting for a love I don’t deserve and probably will never get, but I need her.”

“So what you are saying is that your desire is so insatiable that you were not willing to wait for her? You decided to rape her and strip her of all the dignity she had before you defiled her in this way…You are a fucking disappointment, Adrian. And when you know her love and affection is something you ain’t getting anytime soon, why are you being so goddamn stubborn? Let her go.” Pasha shouted.

“Easy for you to say. You got the love that you wanted, I didn’t.”

“Yeah, maybe next time, if I don’t get the love I want, I will proceed to rape someone, maybe then I will get that love. You sure are leading by example, Adrian.” Pasha mocked him again.

“Get out!” Adrian shouted at her.

Adrian was her boss and when such a direct command was thrown at her, she could not refuse, she exhaled sharply, flipped the bird at him.

She walked to the door but just as her fingers were curling over the handle she turned to Adrian, “You know, I thought you loved her. I thought she was your ‘everything’. But I guess not. Because had she been your ‘everything’, you wouldn’t have raped her. This isn’t about love, this is about possession.” Pasha left slamming the door behind her leaving Adrian at a loss of words for the first time in his life.