Spotlight on Nobody

- 10 -

~ song: oh baby by LCD Soundsystem ~

The small storefront is decorated in black and red, with loads of neon snakes and roses hanging in the window. As dusk falls on South street, the fun characters begin to emerge from the shadows, yelling and singing down the street. Whether they are headed to dinner, a concert or a strip club, it's hard to tell.

"A tattoo parlor?" Leo asks incredulously.

"This is where I got my first tattoo," I say, feeling satisfied when I see Leo's shocked expression.

"You have a tattoo?" It's not that he's disgusted, I mean his arms are smattered with small tattoos. Rather, he seems surprised that a girl like me would have a tattoo, which is the reaction I normally get. It irks me a little that people assume they know me because I wear glasses and do well in school.

"More than one."

"Let me see," he asks eagerly, tugging at my hand as if I'm hiding them in my palms.

"Woa, at least take me out to dinner first," I joke, but make no move to show him the ink. He sighs, resigned. "Do you want to go in?" I offer.

"No, I want to take you to dinner," he says earnestly. After a slight pause, he cracks a smile. "I'm not quite sure where to go," he says sheepishly, and I swear my heart skips a beat in my chest. I managed to go most of the day without realizing how momentous this all is. But for some reason, this small show of humility makes my stomach flip and yet again I ask myself how the fuck I got here.

Somehow, I manage to squeak out the directions to a hole-in-the-wall cheesesteak place to Logan. I call ahead and order us three classic cheesesteaks with the works for takeout.

"Are we not eating there?" Leo asks.

I shake my head. While crusty linoleum floors, flickering incandescent lights and red vinyl barstools is a Philadelphia experience in its own right, it's not the one I want to share with a teen pop sensation.

As the car pulls up, I hop out instinctively to grab the food. I can hear Leo laughing as I get out, and shortly after I hear his door slam.

"And what do you think you're doing?" He says as he grabs my hand.

"Getting the food?" I'm not sure why this is a big deal.

"You're paying?"

"Of course, I haven't paid for anything all day! It's the least I can do to thank Logan."

"And how do you plan on thanking me?" He asks with a smirk.

"Are you flirting with me?" I manage to sound incredibly offended instead of incredibly turned on. "Because I am pretty sure I friend zoned you less than 24 hours ago."

Chuckling, Leo opens the door for me and the delicious smell of grease and more grease washes over us. Big Joe smiles happily from behind the counter, shouting a happy greeting. Leo raises an eyebrow as if to say: "come here often?" Or maybe: "that guy over me?" Though I'm pretty sure the latter is just wishful thinking on my part.

Leo begins to pull out his wallet as we get to the counter and I playfully smack it before running forward and slamming down $15. Triumphantly I spin to face Leo but he's standing a few steps away, a strange expression I can't quite pin on his face. Almost as soon as I see it, it's gone, replaced by his easy-going smile.

As we leave, I toss a cheesesteak through the car window to Logan and tell him to the park the car. With the cheesesteaks in one hand and Leo's hand in the other, I walk towards the river. Walking down the river trail, I let go of Leo's hand. Why was I holding it in the first place? I realize it came as an instinct, like I had to be closer to him. Reflecting on the past few hours, I see that I've been doing it all day. Sitting in the middle seat in the back of the SUV under the ruse of giving directions, but really to be that much closer to Leo. Walking between Leo and Logan, brushing crumbs off the front of Leo's shirt, anything I could to get closer to him, and I didn't even notice it.

"What are you thinking about?" Leo breaks my train of thought. The way the evening sun warms his face gently, makes his green eyes murky and pensive, a light wind blowing wisps of his hair over his forehead, it's all too much. I have to look away, my heart a tight ball in my chest that I have to coax into relaxation. A few moments of internal struggle pass before I can answer.

"I'm thinking about how you're not what I thought you would be," I keep my eyes straight ahead. "Not that I thought much about you before. But I didn't expect you to be so nice."

"Nice is a way to describe boring people," Leo says.

"Let me rephrase," I turn to face him and try to ignore the mini heart attack I have when I look at his face. "I didn't expect you to be so down to earth, like you don't even know who you are; kind when you graciously thank every fan we passed; humble, like how, in some twisted way, you think I have done more than you have in our 20 years. I'm sorry, but all that sums up into nice pretty well."

That same twisted expression is written across his face again, and I want to reach out and smooth his brow. So I do. "What's wrong?" I ask, my hand grazing his forehead. I can't ignore the electricity I feel running through my fingers.

Leo closes his eyes briefly and it looks like he's in genuine pain. When he opens them again, he's back to normal, like nothing happened, and I remove my hand quickly.

Smiling, he motions to our cheesesteaks. "Are we ever going to eat those?"

We've made it to the Art Museum, right where it backs up the river. Sitting on a block of marble, I let my feet dangle over the water as I unwrap our sandwiches. Melted cheese and grease swirl together in a stream down my hand, fat droplets falling onto the paper on my lap. Maybe not the most ladylike meal, I think. I internally scold myself – why should it matter what I look like eating this delicious cheesesteak? Leo and I are friends. Still, I grab a napkin and try to clean my chin off. I hear Leo quietly laugh into his food.

"What's so funny?" I ask.

"Nothing, nothing," he says, still laughing. After an icy stare on my behalf, he cracks. "It's been a while since a girl ate like that around me."

"Oh, sorry that I'm not as poised and refined as your usual crowd," I say in a tone icy enough to match my glare. I can feel the heat rising to my cheeks, which makes me mad, yet again, that I even care what this boy thinks of me. Because, although he is a beautiful, talented, wealthy, and extremely famous popstar, he still is a boy. And I, Nell Greene, am above this. Turning to face him, I shove the remaining few bites of my cheesesteak into my mouth. Fuck being a lady.

I'm surprised when Leo proceeds to shovel the rest of his sandwich into his mouth in one bite, copying me. So surprised, in fact, that I can't properly chew my sandwich and I start to gag on it. Apparently, this is funny, as Leo tries to laugh through his full mouth, and starts to gag on his too-big-bite as well. Through intermittent laughs and choking, we somehow both manage to swallow our food. So there we lay, two twenty-year-old kids under an April sunset, breathless and soaked in normalcy.

"I meant, it's been a while since a girl has been real around me." The sentence is barely audible over the rush of the river below, and it takes me a moment to realize that Leo said it to me. I'm not sure how to respond, so I stay quiet, thinking about Leo continues to surprise me.