Spotlight on Nobody

- 33 -

~ Jet Lag by Gavin Haley ~

I'm crying for what feels like the hundredth time today, but this time for a different reason. Instead of hot tears scalding my cheeks as they fall in pain, these tears snake lazily out of the corners of my eyes as I watch Leo from backstage.

Contrasting to his usual upbeat pop/rock style, his encore performance features only him and an acoustic guitar on an empty stage. His appearance is disheveled from the past two hours of performing, but I've never seen him look more attractive.

He's singing with his eyes closed, in the way he only does when he's remembering something special, something important. It takes my breath away that he considers me one of those things. That this song is about me.

"Just another city

Humid air, curly hair

More than pretty

Midnight discussions at all hours

Feeling stupid just getting her flowers

When everything next to her

Just looks grey

Don't want her to leave me

Oh, but she's too good to stay

I know I'm no good for her

But I love her anyways"

My heart stops.

He loves me.

When it begins to beat again, it does so at a pace ten times faster than before, and I'm itching to run onto the stage and cover him in a million kisses, confess to him – to the world – exactly what I am feeling. That I love him too.

He loves me.

I love him.

He loves me.

The melody seemingly swirls around me, wrapping me in a warm feeling only Leo can bring me. I want to close my eyes, full of comfort, but I can't rip my gaze from Leo's profile. The words he loves me echo in my mind, a whispered accompaniment to his enchanting voice. My heart pounds in my chest, seeming to keep the rhythm of this love ballad.

How did I get here? I wonder, not for the first time since meeting Leo. I mean, I'm standing backstage at a sold-out arena in D.C., where my popstar boyfriend is singing a song he wrote about loving me to thousands of people. Despite the ups and downs that accompanies dating, especially when dating Leo-fucking-Griffiths, I feel more fortunate, more in awe, more in love, with each passing day. We've found love and solace within each other despite the odds. I know people go through much more difficult things than I do – they watch their loved ones go to war, endure famine and disease, are separated by oceans with no means to get across. In moments like these I realize how good I have it, how I should count my blessings, that I shouldn't complain when Leo has to be on tour or when he can't fly to me one weekend. Because at least he can fly to me another weekend, at least I know he's safe, at least I know he's mine.

And right now, watching him profess his love to me in front of thousands, I know he's mine. All mine.

The audience is unusually quiet, and when I finally look over the dimly lit masses of people, I see thousands of glowing lights swaying to the music. My heart leaps into my throat. It's not that Leo explicitly said this song was about me, but he did say: "I wrote this song after I felt the sunshine for what seems like the first time in my whole life." And after the Met Gala pictures we both posted, and that have been featured on the cover of multiple magazines, I'm pretty sure you'd have to live under a rock to not know that we are dating.

When the song ends, I'm torn between being glad that I can finally kiss him and being sad that it doesn't continue indefinitely. Before the lights even go out, I'm running out on the stage, straight towards him. The cheer of the crowd turns into a deafening roar as I fall into his embrace right as the lights cut out on stage, plunging us all in darkness.

The thunderous barrage of the crowd dampens all of my senses except touch, leaving me to drown in Leo's kiss. All I can feel, all I can think, all I can register, is the feel of Leo's lips feverishly enveloping mine, as if I'm the oxygen he breathes. Both my hands reach up and thread through his hair, while his hands roam around my body, making up for all his eyes cannot see in the dark.

While that song was shared with the world, this moment? This moment is just for us.

Breaking our kiss, I trail kisses up his jaw to his ear.

"I love you too," I confess, my lips pressed against his ear, ensuring it's the only thing he can hear over the crowd's roar.