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XXXIX. This Is For Real

A/N: Wedding bells <3
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XXXIX. This Is For Real

NOVEMBER:

"It's time sweetie," my brother Nathan informs me as he walks into my old bedroom smiling while Bex finishes the final touches on my look.

Today is the day I marry the love of my life. My one true love.

It's hard to imagine that nearly seven months ago I was in this same situation. Back then, I thought that man was the love of my life. Little did I know, my true love was quickly going to come into my life, completely changing my plans for the better.

If this was over three months ago, I would've been a nervous wreck, completely beside myself. I'd be worried that he was going to run like the last one. Worried that he was going to change his mind. Hell, I wouldn't have probably been in this situation because I was still hooked up on a man who didn't love me anymore and quiet honestly, probably never did. At least not the way I always dreamed about as a little girl.

As a little girl, I always dreamed I'd marry a man one day that would sweep me off my feet and give me the moon if able to. He'd be handsome, charming, and would love me unconditionally. I'd be his only one forever and always. All those months ago, I had that dream crushed. I had nothing to show for myself but a broken heart.

After that day, I'd swore myself off of relationships, marriage, children, all of it that I dreamed of for a majority of my life. A meaningless boy had put it in not only my head but also my heart, that I wasn't worthy of any of that. For a long time, I believed him. I believed in his lie of the woman he wanted me to be and forgot the woman that I truly am. I'm not weak, unworthy, unloved.

No, I'm a strong woman who is worthy of everything I could ever and will ever want. Most of all, I'm loved, by so many people. People, that for the last seven months, have been by my side helping me cope, helping me thrive, and helping me to finally love again.

I've come so far and I'm damn proud of myself for the woman I've become and right now in this moment, I'm not one bit nervous like I was back then. Yes I have butterflies in my stomach but out of pure excitement. Just downstairs, my love is waiting for me to become his wife.

"You know, this is nothing like what was planned for your wedding with Bryan. But honestly, I love it more. This just speaks Heather and Carter," Bex smiles warmly at me in the mirror as she puts the remaining flowers in my hair.

For our special day, I've gone with a basic half up, half down hairstyle with some baby's breath braided in. My hair is loosely curled, just the way Carter likes it. My wedding dress is a two piece. The top has laced 3/4 sleeves and low v-cut. The hem goes down to a few inches below my breasts, like a crop top. The sequenced skirt is high waisted, going up to right below the top, only showing an inch or so of my midriff. It's not obnoxiously long and very basic. Needless to say it's nothing like the obnoxious wedding dress I was almost married in seven months ago. Honestly, I agree with Bex, I love the way this one turned out more. Everything about this wedding is just perfect.

Instead of doing our ceremony at the church like before, we went with doing it at my parent's home. Nate and Bex's wedding reception was such a hit when they did it here and I still had the set up from it, planning on using it for my wedding with Bryan. I'm damn proud of how I did their reception and I'm not ashamed to reuse it. I fell in love with the idea of an outdoor wedding, especially during the fall. It's not too hot or cold this time of year and right before North Dakota winter hits hard.