If heart ache was a physical pain, I could face it.

Part Seventeen

Anne’s POV

Sitting across from Doctor Lawson is surprising a lot easier now that I have Tom by my side, I look across at him while waiting for the Doctor to speak and he gives me a reassuring smile, holding my hand tightly in his, and I cling to him as if he were my life support.

“I’m so sorry Anne, but it’s not good news.” I feel Tom’s grip on my hand tighten as we both inhale sharply in unison. But how bad is bad? “The tumour is very large, if we had diagnosed it earlier then maybe, we would be in a different position right now.” If we had caught it sooner? Why didn’t I just go to the doctors when I first felt ill? Oh, because I thought I was pregnant that’s why, and now that feels like a million miles away.  

“So what are you saying?” Tom asks, his voice wavering.

“I’m saying that the cancer is too far gone to be treated. We need to find a donor, and soon.” Soon? But how soon is soon? I try to look over at Tom only to realise I can’t look him in the eye. How’s he feeling right now? Because I know I’d much rather find out I was dying than he was.

“Soon?” Tom asks, chocking out the word.

“Anne.” The Doctor says to me, an air of finality in his voice.  “In case we can’t find this donor, I’d suggest you start doing the things you want to do.”

“How soon?” Tom shouts getting angry now, in attemp to mask his pain, but I know him too well. 

“I’d say without the transplant you only have a month live.” A month. One month. How can we possibly find a donor in one month? I’ll never have my dream wedding in Paris, I’ll never have children, I won’t even see my twenty first birthday. One month and my life could be over. “We’ve moved you to the top of the transplant list, but I want you to know that even if we do find you one, it’s not defiantly a cure. There will still be a chance your body might reject it, we won’t know how high that chance is until we find a liver. I’m very sorry.” I sit staring numbly at the doctor for the second time in just as many days without knowing what to say or do. But before I know it Tom’s pulling me up and out of my chair.

“Tom?” I ask confused. Surely there’s more to talk about.

“We’re going. He has a liver to find, and we’re wasting time.” He says angrily, marching towards the door.

“I’ll do everything I can.” The Doctor says, before Tom rounds on him.

“You’d better, because if anything happens to Anne, I’ll be holding you responsible.” He threatens 

Charly’s POV

I’m sitting in the living room with the girls, while the boys are all out doing... boy things. And I can barley contain my excitement; but what if Max doesn’t want to tell anyone yet? And why aren’t the girls interested? Surely they can see how excited I am.

“Just tell us already, before you burst!” Roxie laughs eventually, and all the girls turn to me amusement alight in their eyes.

“No I can’t.” I shake my head; wanting nothing more than to be able to tell them. The girls quickly lose interest and turn back towards the TV and that’s when I can contain myself no longer.

“Me and Max are going out!” My hand flies over mouth when I realise what I’ve just blurted out. Will he be mad? But the girls reactions surprise me.

“I wondered when you were going to tell us.” Sophie laughs.

“I thought we were you friends why even think about hiding it from us?” Jess asks, while pretending to be hurt.

“Wait. You all knew?” I ask shocked.

“Of course we did! It’s so obvious you have liked him for like ever.” Sophie answers. “And who do you think gave Max the nudge he needed to tell you how he really felt for the second time?” She winks at me. I stare at my friends with my mouth wide open, they all knew! Suddenly their lack of interest makes sense, they were winding me up!

Tom’s POV

I look down at Anne watching her sleeping peacefully, not a single line of worry on her beautiful face, and I envy her. I want to be able to sleep, I want to be able to forget even if it's only for a short period of time. Today really tired her out. Well us noth out but while she’s able to sleep because of this, this thing inside her, I’m left awake, with no company other than my horrid thoughts. Not knowing were to, only knowing I can’t stay inside these four walls with out losing my mind, I grab my coat and head outside into the late night. Tears begin streaming down my face but they quickly mix with heavy rain. One month. How can I make this one month so special when all I want to do is drink myself into oblivion so I can forget the whole thing. Standing outside the pub I realise I need to stay sober. For Anne’s sake. As much as it pains me she needs me. And inviting as one drink is I know I won’t be able to stop there. I need to continue trying my hardest to keep it together, because if I lose it, how can I possibly put the pieces back together?

Before I even realise it, I notice that I’m stood outside my old home. Will I even get a chance to explain? Will they even care? The girl that I love is dying and I’d be lying if I said the only reason I was standing here right now was to get her, her friends back. My main reason is much more selfish. I can’t do this. I’m losing it right now. I promised Anne I would always be there for her, but when it’s much easier to live in a bottle how can I? And when I do eventually give in, she needs people to be there for her. Or maybe they can help keep me sane? Anne’s always talking about how much she needs me, but the truth is I need her more than that. She’s my everything and without her I’m nothing.

I knock on the door only to get no answer; it’s no surprise really only bats should be awake at this time. In my anger and frustration I begin kicking the door, which not only feels great it also makes a hell of a lot of noise.

“Alright, alright! I’m coming!” I here a voice shout. The only person I hoped wouldn’t answer the door. Max. But it’s too late to back out now.

Max opens the door quickly in his anger, but goes to close it even faster. Luckily I manage to get my foot in the door first.

“Please Max, it’s about Anne.” I beg. My tears seeming to fall faster now that the rain has stopped.

“What’s the matter, the bitch cheat on you too?” He spits at harshly.

“You don’t mean that.” I spit back, and the look in Max’s eyes tell me he still cares about her, even when his words don’t.

“I do, as far as I’m concerned you and her can rot in hell.”

“Well you might just get your wish, because she’s dying, and if she goes she’s taking me with her!” I scream.