Floating on Daydreams

Denouement

I know that I may have seemed excessively negative in the later parts of this compilation of the wild, wild thoughts that flood my mind and make me feel like I'm drowning. I know I may have scared you. I know that my writing hasn't been the best, but it was always the best I could do with my level of experience and ability. I know that oftentimes, I seemed naive for feeling the emotions that I did, when I did, the way I did. I couldn't have possibly expected a different outcome, right? Well, those of you who know me, or have spoken to me, know that I choose to see the best in people, and sometimes, that blinds me from their true intentions. Most people take advantage of this particular characteristic of mine. I'm not blaming them. It's the way we're all wired. We become hypocrites the second the opportunity for upward movement arises.  It makes us feel special, for a little while. Superior, even.

The thing about our world is, it's programmed to stomp the belief out of the believers. It steals people we love away from us in the dead of night. It spins faster and faster until we can no longer stand on our own two feet. It's times like that when I choose to use my hands to support myself. My hands help me make full use of the wonderful, liberating outlet for emotions that writing opens the door to.

And so, I can assure you with the utmost confidence that I believe wholeheartedly in the concept of love. I believe in pegasi and unicorns and pegacorns and dragons and fairy dust. Unapologetically.  The world may be filled with backstabbers and pickpockets and heartbreakers, but I believe in the little warm light around people's hearts. They may not be aware of it, but I am certain it exists in every living, breathing person. 

I know for a fact that I'm always making mistakes. I'm proud of that, because that means that I'm not intimidated by the fear of failure. I make mistakes every day, and I learn from them. Then I make different mistakes the next day, and learn from those too. Starting to write Floating on Daydreams was not a mistake, and I'm positive ending it isn't a mistake either. 

Perhaps I should explain myself. After all, I've bared my soul to you so many times before.
I feel as though writing here will no longer serve the purpose it has served so beautifully in the past. Things I've experienced recently have left me with a lot of questions to answer, and that's something I can't do while hiding behind my writing. Another reason for me finishing this book, is that I need to change who I am. Everything about me except the little light around my heart needs a serious reinvention. I feel as though if I keep writing in this, I'll be stuck in the past. And the past is something I'm trying to forget. I've had ups and downs and more downs, and right now, the only way to go is up, so that's where I'm hoping to end up.

Another factor that played heavily into this decision is the fact that I'm going to be done with high school in a few months, and I wanted to spend all my time focused on building a future for myself. It's a dog-eat-dog world out there, and if I'm going to take it by storm, I have to learn to ride the wind.

They say that every plot has seven parts; right now, I'd say the plot of the first stage of my life is at the part where everything becomes clear--I've learned so many valuable lessons, and I'm applying them to my life--Denouement. 

It's time for me to stop floating on daydreams and embrace life with all it's flaws, but I cannot thank you enough for supporting me and being my virtual shoulder to cry on. Thank you for being the amazing, wonderful people that you choose to be, and laughing with me when I had my rare but overwhelming bursts of joy. Thank you even for the criticism. No matter how harsh it was, I learned something from it every single time. Thank you for listening. For wishing me well. For searching for the slightest trace of a brighter future to lift me up when I was stranded in the dark.

I love every single one of you people. You were my wayfaring companions. I will treasure that forever, I promise.

Love,
The girl with the wide eyes filled with wonder, fears, big dreams, and affection.

♥

This is the last segment of Floating on Daydreams. I hope you enjoyed reading this tiny portion of my soul. Please leave a comment if you're reading this so that I can thank each of you personally.
Also, I may eventually start a separate compilation of work similar to this. It's just that right now, I really want to move on.