Comedic Gold

Don't Trust Cats

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Author's POV:
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Tired as hell, Y/N marches around the kitchen to make herself something for breakfast, but before she could even open a box of cereal, Ginger weaved around her feet, meowing hungrily for her attention. Sighing, she smiles down at the cat.

"All right, I'll feed you first." And so, Y/N picks up the cat bowl and fills it with kibble only to be stared at intensely by the cat. "What? You have food right there," she says pointing to the bowl. Licking her whiskers, Ginger paws at the woman and kneads at her pajama pants in silent plead. Sighing roughly, the woman throws her head back.

"Fine, but no midday treats, you got that?" From the cabinet, she pulls out a can of wet food, extra gravy like Ginger likes, and pops it open, exciting the feline as she places it beside her bowl. "There, happy?" Before she could go back to preparing her own meal, however, there was a loud scratch on the door. She groans as it persists.

"What now?" Stomping her feet, the woman makes her way to the front door and throws it open before immediately looking down at the army of cats that had invaded her lawn. Their eyes sparkle upon seeing her as they began meowing, crying out in hunger for a morsel to eat. Sighing again, Y/N rubs her temples before turning away.

"Fine, fine, just give me a minute." That minute was spent scouring the kitchen for something to give them so that they would leave her alone but the bag of cat food was already in need of a replacement and there were no more cans of wet food. In the end she decides to sacrifice a few packets of tuna she was saving for herself along with whatever was left of the cat treats.

"Forgive me, Ginger. I swear I'll buy you new treats later." Returning to the door, Y/N throws the treats as far as she could to distract the mob before setting out the tuna in bowls and slamming the door shut. After they eat, they should be out of her hair.

"I'm so sick of these cats eating all my damn food," she grumbles, shuffling back into the kitchen to finish making breakfast, spilling cereal into the bowl. All that's left now is to fill it with milk and finally sit down, but when she opened the refrigerator, she did not expect to find Lorenzo crammed between the shelves, stuffing his face with all the food he could grab. Her brow twitched as he turned towards her in annoyance, as though she was the insufferable one.

"Get the fuk out, bish. I'm busy!" He shouts with a full mouth, causing a few crumbs to tumble down his chin, before slamming the door shut to seal himself back in. Y/N throws her hands up in frustration, giving up.

"Fuck this. I'm going back to bed."