Alone Together (Gallavich)

thirteen

ian

Christmas morning went as it usually does. Fiona made pancakes and bacon for all of us, an alternative to the regular cereal and eggs that we ate on the daily. Monica had been making me giant breakfasts for the last few weeks so I wasn't really in the mood for more pancakes, but the circumstances made it much more enjoyable. We all went around the table while we ate and listed the top three things we would have asked for if we could have. It sounds depressing, I know - to think about everything you're missing out on because your dad's a drunk, your mom's insane and you had no choice but to grow up in the slums of the south side - but it's actually sort of fun. Besides, I think by now my siblings and I have all accepted that these are the circumstances that surround our lives. There's not much to do about it except make the most of it.

"I'd totally want a new knife set. If I'm gonna have any shot ruling this block, I need new knives. That's obvious."

"Carl, do you ever say anything that couldn't get you convicted as a psychopath?"

"You don't get it Fiona. You're just not on that kind of level."

Fiona rolled her eyes and laughed as she watched Carl take another bite of his food, disapproval towards our big sister's lack of street weaponry respect written all over his face. She turned to me next.

"What about you Ian? What's on your list?"

Every year I had some ideas. When I turned 13 I wanted a smartphone and one of those indestructible cases. The year after that I wanted Blackhawks tickets. But this year, I never thought about it. The last few months were so insane. Up until about 16 hours ago, I hadn't even remembered today was Christmas.

"I uh, I don't really have a list."

"What do you mean you don't have a list," Lip asked lightly.

"Yeah you always have something way awesome and out of reach. Remember that one year you said you had been looking at those $260 sneakers. You had us all imagining you as Michael Jordan," Fiona added, smiling.

"I don't know," I shrugged. "Guess I haven't really thought about it."

"Well what about right now," Debbie spoke up quietly.

"What do you mean Debs?"

"Like right now, what would be on your list if you had to choose something?"

Everyone stopped eating, awaiting my response. I thought about the last year, the last few months specifically. There was no time for me to pine after expensive gifts. There were no playoff tickets or overpriced clothing items that I really wanted. My days were filled with running from death-by-baseball-bat to running from... well, running from reality. I'd really only wanted two things: to be with Mickey and never had gone into work that Monday afternoon. There was so much I wish didn't happen, things that I could undo. Then I had it.

"A time machine."

Everyone was silent for a second so I looked down at my plate, moving around my food with my fork.

"Dude you know those don't exist, right?"
I looked back up to see Carl shaking his head at me, laughing. I couldn't help but smirk back.

"Yeah, Carl. I guess you're right."

"I know. God, sometimes I feel like I'm the only smart person in this family."

"Ooookay buddy finish up your food now," Fiona laughed.

In high spirits, we finished up our breakfasts together like we always did on Christmas.

~

I was helping Fiona clean up while Carl, Liam, Debbie and Lip were in the living room watching some holiday movie that was on.

"Lip told me you went to Monica's," she finally spoke up, keeping her focus on the dishes she was cleaning. I froze up a little while I brought some more plates from the table over to where she was by the sink, not wanting to have to go through this conversation again.

"Yea. I did."

It was silent for a minute again, but I knew the conversation wasn't over.

"D'you go cause of Mickey?"

I looked up and stopped what I was doing, finding Fiona had done the same.

"Why would I have-"

"Lip went to talk to him a few times when you were gone, trying to get him to help find you. He said you guys got into it or something that day you came home crying."

My mouth opened but I didn't have anything to say.

"Ian, you know I love you no matter what. Nothing you could do would make me feel any different. You're my little brother." She paused, waiting for a response from me that just wasn't coming.

"Ian?"

"Yeah Fiona?"

"You like Mickey Milkovich?"

I slowly nodded, not really sure what else to do in that moment.

"Did he do somethi-" she sounded a little angry so I cut her off, wanting to reassure her before she jumped to any conclusions about Mickey.

"I didn't leave because of him. I mean, yea, we got into a fight I guess and that's part of why I left but-" I stopped myself, feeling my heart beginning to race a little.

"But what?"

"Something happened Fi and, and I don't really want to talk about it now. I just- I'm not really ready for that yet."

She looked worried and upset, but she nodded anyway, respecting my feelings.

"Yeah, okay. I trust you."

"Thanks."

We finished cleaning up in silence before heading into the living room to join our siblings for the rest of the movie.

so this one was kinda short. sorry bout that. i just want to 1) keep posting chapters since we're almost at 200 views (thank you sooo much btw) and 2) this is another one of those chapters that is sort of a filler to the next part of the plot and I feel like it just wouldn't work if I extended it into a longer part/shortened it to fit something else more pivotal in. Thank you again for all the support. Love you!

45 votes overall for next chpt!