The six elements

Chapter 27 -The New Element-

The weekend was probably the longer of my existence. Every sound made me jump, every thought made me want to scream. I didnt sleep, I couldnt allow myself. Nightmares haunt me and anguish devours me. Why did this life come back? I took all the necessary precautions to forget it forever. I enter the cafeteria, trembling like a leaf. I dont have the courage to find my friends. The ones who think they know me, but who basically are only talking to a stranger. Theyll probably ask me why I didnt go to class this morning, but the reason is simple. I couldnt get in my car. I try to block myself mentally from all thoughts, to destroy every memory, but Liams arrival complicates the task. I join my friends at our usual table, and I feel like a question session is about to fall on me.

Tessa! Simon says, worried. Where were you?

We didnt get any news all weekend, Stephanie adds as she makes me a place beside her.

Sorry, I grunt, I had a migraine.

I feel Gabriellas imposing look on me. I know that she doesnt believe any word of this migraine and Ill have to find a better reason when well be alone. I instinctively look behind me to see if someones watching me.

Tess? Im talking to you, Melissa says impatiently.

Yes, what?

Youre really pale Are you sure that everything is okay?

Maybe you should eat something before going to class, Matt insists.

No, Im fine Im telling you! I say with a dry tone.

At this moment, something sags on the floor with a thump which makes me jump. More than it should have.

Its just a chair, Gabriella mumbles, crossing her arms on her chest, theres no reason to be so scared.

I feel my pulse accelerate in all the members of my body. I hate this. Being nervous. Constantly being scared.

Lets talk about Friday night, Melissa says to cut the tension.

Yes, it was awesome, Simon says.

Tessa, I was wondering why you became white like a sheet when I talked to you about the song called Tremor?

I suddenly feel an important urge to vomit. I jump up and make my chair fall as I lean on the table. Some students turn around to see where all this noise is coming from. I feel my muscles become weaker and weaker, and I dont think I can bear the weight of my body for long.

Ill be back, I whisper between two short inspirations.

I get out of the cafeteria and head rapidly towards the outdoors. I ignore everyone who give my funny looks and finally find refuge in the forest behind the school. I let myself fall on my knees near a tree and I cant stop my envy of spitting out the breakfast I had this morning. I finally get up with my eyes half-closed, trying to calm down. Maybe I just ate something not fresh this morning and thats all. A small, muffled cry from above, quickly followed by a falling branch makes me jump. Before I look up, a voice prevents me.

Are you feeling okay?

I turn around rapidly to face Liam. I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand by reflex. Leave me, I beg him as I move towards another tree to lean on it. Im already ashamed enough because of what happened Friday, dont make it worse.

I didnt come to talk about Friday. If it can help you, I feel ashamed too. To refuse a person as beautiful as you isnt me at all. Rare are the women who whisper the name of another man in my presence I must admit. He lays his hand on his heart in a dramatic manner. It hurt so much he grunts, holding back a smile.