FALL (DIMENSION Series #1)

CHAPTER 10

After my parents left, Neal and Nisha entered my hospital room.

     "How are you?" they asked in unison.

     "I'm fine," I replied.

     I was caught off-guard by the concern in their eyes. They seemed to still be in shock. They also looked uncomfortable in the sterile hospital room. They glanced around at the machines I was hooked up to. Machines that grunted from time to time. They asked if I wanted anything from the vending machine in the waiting area. Something other than the applesauce and jello they were certain I'd be served.

     "A Snickers bar, maybe?" Nisha asked.

      I shook my head. I loved chocolate, but I didn't feel like eating anything right now.

      "Did you see me falling?" I blurted out. It wasn't something I had meant to ask them right then. But I suddenly needed to know.

      "We saw you go over the edge," Neal responded. "But we didn't see your actual fall."

     I could see bafflement in his eyes. I knew he found it strange as well. I could sense that both Neal and Nisha wanted to say something about my fall and my survival of it. But I could also see they weren't ready to say it yet. Maybe they didn't want to upset me in my delicate state.

      "I'm going home tomorrow," I said.

      "Hopefully you'll get some days off from school?" Nisha asked and smiled. She was still wearing her red puffer jacket. The red was in stark contrast to the bleak room and seemed to beam out optimism.

      "Hopefully," I said, smiling back at her. A part of me wanted time away from school. I didn't want to have to explain the accident to Julia or to Mary Rose or to anyone else. And I also didn't want to deal with the fake concern of those kids who never paid attention to me otherwise. I wasn't in the mood to talk about it.

     But I was dying to see Derek, despite the absence of any text from him. And of course I was hoping that he might have texted me since my fall, but I didn't know. I hadn't checked my phone since before the start of the hike. And anyway, he hadn't actually said that he would text me. He had just asked for my contact information. So technically he hadn't done anything wrong by not texting. But even if he had, I knew I would find a way to forgive his misdeed.

     It seemed that this would be the dynamic between us. I would always give him the benefit of the doubt. And it was because my heart was in his hands now. That was how it felt. I knew it was crazy and I couldn't explain it. But it seemed an absolute reality. I was as sure of it as I was of the pain in my shoulder.

      "I'll visit you at your house tomorrow," Neal said, pushing his hand through his unruly blond curls.

     I could see he was itching to leave this room. I imagined he was uncomfortable with sickness, like so many men were.

      "And I will too," Nisha said.

      I smiled back at Nisha.

     I suddenly had the crazy urge to tell her about Derek. It was like his name was on the tip of my tongue and I just had to say it out loud. It was circling my thoughts, wanting to crash out of my mouth and into the world: Derek, Derek, Derek, I kept repeating his name in my head.

     It was unusual for me to want to discuss Derek with anyone. Thinking about him, and obsessing about him, had been my private guilty pleasure. I wondered if the fall had shaken up some things inside me. If those had somehow been jolted into action and if they were now going to boil up to the surface. I continued having the strong impulse to tell Nisha about Derek. Some things about my feelings for him, at least. Not all of it, but the outlines of the obsession, maybe. But of course it wouldn't be possible to say anything with Neal in the room.