FALL (DIMENSION Series #1)

CHAPTER 44

"So," I said, and turned to face Derek as he and I sped by trees and sky and closed in on the mountains in the distance. "You're hanging out with Isabelle these days?" As soon as the question was out, I flushed.

     "Shit," I muttered under my breath. That was not what I'd meant to say. I'd really wanted to ask him about his disappearance and his reappearance and the ways in which he'd been so distant and aloof. Not about Isabelle specifically.

    "I'm not hanging out with her in any kind of meaningful way," Derek said, glancing away from the road to look at me. His eyes got darker, as if a shadow was moving in across them

     "Well," I said, and I had to control the rage I felt that was starting to boil up inside me. "At least you talk to her."

     Despite my anger, I was starting to come to some insights about the Derek situation and my reaction to it. I could more easily accept the otherwordliness of the boy than his decision to spend time with Isabelle. I could accept that he probably belonged in another dimension, but not that he belonged to Isabelle Bree.

     "Yeah, I talk to her," Derek said and frowned as he looked at me sideways.

     "Yeah, and you haven't been talking to me," I said, and immediately regretted the sentence. It revealed more than I'd intended to. He'd know how I really felt about Isabelle. He'd know that I was jealous. And he'd know how his indifference had wounded me.

     "I'm sorry, Ellie," he finally said. "I have some things to tell you."

     "Okay," I replied, and noticed that I was feeling lighter. I was hoping his explanation would make things better. That this very bad situation could somehow be restored to how things were before he'd left. I thought of that night in our yard and how the stars had been big and bright as we'd sat under the tree. And how I'd been so happy that I never wanted the night to end. I wanted to rewind back to that moment and start again from there.

     I was waiting for him to talk, but he was silent. He was driving fast and seemed focused on the road. The jeep clanged as the landscape became more familiar. I had a sense of where we were going, but I couldn't really believe that he was bringing me here. Here.

     "The trail?" I muttered incredulously as he parked the jeep under a tree. It felt like we'd returned to the scene of a crime. We were back to where I'd hiked the Saturday before. The place where my fall had happened.

     "You coming?" he asked and I saw that he'd already gotten out of the jeep while I was still sitting—too stunned to move.

     I got out and looked over at him.

     "I'll explain why we're here," he said. "Walk with me." His mouth had a hint of a smile and his eyes were green and gold and beautiful. And again I felt like I was floating. Like all the doubt and dread inside me had been erased. How could a simple sentence like Walk with me make me go all fluttery inside? How could it erase the anguish of the days before?

     Of course I walked with him. I was next to him and I thought of how we'd left the cafeteria. I'd been right at his side. What the hell did it all mean? Why was he giving me mixed signals? But despite my reservations, I continued walking next to him. Of course I did.

     We were silent and I thought it appropriate. There was a certain sense of gravity to the expedition. I had flashbacks to my last hike here and I also felt anxious about the things Derek wanted to tell me. I wasn't in a mood for idle chatter. When we finally spoke, I wanted it to be about the things that mattered. 

     The strange thing was that he had picked out the same trail that I'd done with Nisha and Neal. How did he know to pick this one? It seemed further evidence of his intuition and his way of knowing things that weren't supposed to be known. And why was he making me retrace my steps?

     We walked fast and didn't stop. I registered the density of the trees and the colors of the leaves. They offered some relief, as if they were softening things with their luxurious shades of red and orange. We reached it in no time—the spot from where I fell.

     "How did you know it was here?" I asked. I wondered if someone had shared the details of my fall. And even if they had, it would be hard to know about this particular spot unless he'd walked here previously.

     He shrugged.

     "I know some things," he said.

     "How?" I asked.

     "Through some strange process that's like a kind of osmosis," he muttered. "I know some things as if I'd absorbed them without being aware of when or how I actively absorbed them." 

     He looked at me closely. I could make out he was trying to read my expression. He was making sure that he wasn't going too far. That all this strangeness he was spewing out wouldn't alienate me. I didn't know how I knew what he felt as he was talking to me. I just did. It was like I could feel it in my bones, or something. Not only had I recently started cursing a lot more, but I also seemed to have become more intuitive. It was strange, like some kind of metamorphosis had been put in motion.

     "Were you here when it happened?" I asked. The question had been propelled by a flashback I was having. I was seeing him again as I had the day of my fall. How he'd been with me when I was plummeting down the mountain—certain that I would die. And how he'd morphed from a post-card like image into a three-dimensional presence.

     "What makes you ask that?" he asked and there was genuine surprise in his eyes.

     "I saw you as I was falling," I replied and bit down on my lip. This was it. The moment of truth. My heart was pounding. I was finally going to tell him how things had gone down that day. I had nothing to lose. Maybe if I told him my deepest secrets, he'd do the same for me. 

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