Surrender

Chapter Four

Chapter 4

Daniella's

Tumungo ako sa walk-in closet ko and I started to pick an outfit for Elle's kaetchosan.

It has been a long time that I've been to the beach. And I don't quite remember when I did go to the beach. Naaalala ko lang na naligo ako at nag sun-bathing? Pero 'yun naman yata talaga ang ginagawa sa beach diba?

While I was having a struggle in finding my summer clothes, I finally managed to fish out some decent clothes?

But I do want to wear them. Feeling ko ang confident kong tignan kung naka ganito ako.

It makes me feel like I am me. 

I was torn between two outfits, a tube top body fitting black dress or a black bralette with white square pants. Hmmm. What should I pick?

Before letting my other self decide for me, bigla nalang nandilim ang aking paningin.

FLASHBACK

" Love, I'm warning you. If I see you go out wearing that only that, you are not going to get out of this room. I'm not being manipulative, I just don't like how those assholes would look at you. It makes me jealous! Sa akin ka lang dapat magpapaganda! You don't have to please them!"

"Ang cute mo talaga. Pero sige na nga, i'll just wear this cover-up para 'di masyadong revealing. There. Is this okay na?"

"Yep. Beautiful *kiss* "

"Love, on a second thought, 'bat matatakot sa mga lalaking titingin sa'kin kung nanjan ka naman parati sa tabi ko? Right you said you'll protect me?

"Oo naman love, I'll protect you no matter what it costs, kahit buhay ko pa ang nakasalalay. I'd rather suffer than let you suffer. I would kill me seeing you hurt.Im not intentionally saying this things para 'di mo ako breakan, but this is me indirectly saying that I need a *pout* "

"EW! TIGILAN MO NGA YAN NIKOLO DAVID NEPOMNUCENO! ANG CORNY MO!"

"I love you too babe HAHAHAHAH!"

"Shut up! Wag mo na ulit ako babanatan ng ganyan! Baka ma suntok nanaman kita!"

"Tatanggapin ko kahit na ano, basta mula sayo Daniella, tandaan mo yan."

"Kahit tae?"

"EW WHAT THE HECK LOVE! ANG BABOY MO!"

"So ngayon alam mo na kung anong nafefeel ko kung bumanat ka."

END OF FLASHBACK

That memory quickly played in my mind. It feels so real.

Did I have a boyfriend before? Bakit naman hindi ko siya maalala? Is it because I watch too much kdrama?Or maybe too much chocolate in my system?

Argh! Ewan. I dont want to think about it too much. My head hurts everytime I try to harvest some memories.

I'm having doubts now parang may mga taong nagsisinungaling sakin. Parang may mga kailangan pa akong malaman. May mga bagay pa na dapat kong malaman. Pero mahirap talagang malaman ang mga lihim na sayo lang tinatago.

You cant blame me for being too paranoid. These dreams are regularly showing up. Baka naman hindi lang to imagination. They seem so real and i felt that it really happened to me. Alam niyo yun? That feeling when you're dreaming and then suddenly you feel the emotions na parang nangyayari mismo sayo?

Curiosity may have killed the cat. But I guess I'll try if it kills the person too.

CHAROT!

Impossible namang na mag sinungaling sakin sila kuya and my friends. They're like my everything. Nasobrahan lang siguro ako sa panunbuod ng nexflix.

Speaking of netflix, medyo maaga pa naman so I decided to watch muna bago ako umalis. Masyadong maaga pa naman so, i doubt na tapos na silang mag ayos. Baka nga kakagising palang nila eh.

Anuba yan. Tapos na ako sa isang episode ng Riverdale wala pa ring text si Elle. Bwisit na babaeng yun. 

I checked my phone at dun ko na nakita yung message niyang hinahanap na ako. I forgot to unmute my phone. Argh!

Dali-dali naman akong nagligpit ng mga dadalhin ko at pumunta na sa sa lobby ng condo. While i was on the way to the lobby,nag book na ako ng grab. I wont bring my car because hassle lang yun. Sigurado akong may sasakyan na kaming gagamitin. I'm too lazy to drive anyway. Sayang na rin sa gas. 

I can't help but be excited! Pero tinatago ko lang. Baka mamaya di nanaman to matuloy. 

Baliw si Elle pero ito ang isa sa mga bagay na nagawa niya ng matino.

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Unknown 

The smell of a long-forgotten place. I never imagined that i would be back here. 

Dito ko binaon ang mga alaalang pilit kong nililihim sa kanya. 

Memories that should be forgotten. Masasaktan lang siya kung malalaman niya pa. I can't handle it anymore. I had to do this. I had to leave and go back here. 

May mga sekretong dapat malaman. Meron ding mga dapat nalang kalimnutan. 

I dont want to see her hurting. It breaks my heart. Ako ang may kasalanan ng lahat. Kaya ako na ang nagsakripisyo, ako na ang aayos nito. Kung sakaling maayos man, hindi ko alam kung handa na ako. Pero kailangan ko maging handa.

Para sa kanila. Dahil pamilya ko sila. And for my family I'd do everything.

Kaya napag-isipan kong . bumalik dito, sa lugar kung saan naka libing ang mga alaala. Alam kong may mga taong pinipilit na buhayin sila, pero nandito na ako. Hinding-hindi ko hahayaan na makawala sila. 

Marami na akong na sakripisyo. I dont want all of that go to waste. 

- End of Chapter -

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Thank you so much for reading!