Caught Up In Your Lies(Ricky Olson FanFic)

Chapter 21

I stared at the picture painted on my skin.
The word "Worthless" encrypted deep within and the crimson liquid spilled out. I was on the edge of giving up.
I was ready to die, but I was waiting. I did not wish to kill this child, for I had already found parents for her.
"Blade?" A voice asked outside the door.
I was so deep within thought that I did not hear them.
"Blade? Answer me. Why is there blood coming outside from inside your room?" They said.
"Let me die..." I whispered quite loudly without thinking properly.
The door flew open seconds later and I was lifted off of the floor.
The person, who looked very similar to Ricky - though I could not tell because of my blurry vision - was cleaning my cuts and bandaging them.
Then, there was a female's voice present.
The male and female were arguing but I was too far gone to even comprehend 2+2.
Everything went black and I was sent into a word of dreams.
~Dream World~
I'm searching through the swarm of people, looking for him.
I knew he had left me years ago, when I was little. We were inseparable then he left me.
We were young but knew much that people did not expect us to know.
He was 15 while I was 12. Weird, I know but something about him made me want him.
He loved me, I could see it in his eyes until she stepped into the picture. Jessica ruined us and I was crushed.
There he was, holding onto her as if his life depended on it.
I felt a tear fall from my eye without permission and I wanted to break down at the sight.
It still hurts me, for him to love her as much as he claimed to love me.
Suddenly, the people around me seemed to disappear and I felt truly alone, watching their love grow by the second.
I fell to my knees and the world went black.
~End Of Dream World~
My eyes slowly opened and I was in a room that wasn't mine.
It was dim in the room and I heard the faint sounds of rain.
I slowly sat up and realized I was in Ricky's room.
I felt the baby kick and I groaned slightly.
I stood up from the bed and walked down to the kitchen.
All of the guys were in the living room talking until I came in.
I rolled my eyes at them and fixed a huge ass plate of food.
I then proceeded to eat it as the guys' eyes were glued on me.
"What the hell are you fucking staring at?" I asked after I swallowed the food in my mouth.
They quickly turned to look at something else.
"Whatever." I said and finished the food rather quickly and walked back upstairs, gripping my back.
I was going to go back to my room but something caught my eye that made me go back into Ricky's.
It was the painting I painted.
The one of me, him and the baby.
I didn't want to keep the baby but I wanted to keep him, yet I lost him.
I turned and walked to my room, trying to remember what happened before I knocked out.
I vaguely recalled what happened and frowned.
I sat on my bed and drew a portrait of Motionless In White.
After a few hours of working on it, someone knocked on my door.
"Come in." I said softly as I continued my drawing.
The door opened and I glanced up and saw Ricky.
I stopped drawing and crossed my arms, glaring at him.
"What do you want?" I asked harshly.
"To talk." He said simply.
"You have a minute." I said, even though he probably wouldn't say what he had to say that quick.
"Okay so, when you were in a coma, I saw that you were pregnant and I thought it wasn't mine, so I got back with Jessica. And when I found you with those cuts in your arms earlier, I lost it. Jessica said rude things about you while I was cleaning and bandaging them up and I broke it off with her. I blew up at her. And I realized, that I needed you. I want you, I crave you. I miss you and need you. I love you." He said and turned to leave.
"Wait." I said, "Please stay."
"Is it really mine?" He asked.
"She's really yours but it doesn't really matter because I've already found parents for her." I said, looking at him.
He just nodded.
I yawned and set my art supplies off to the side.
"Sleep with me?" I asked.
He smiled and nodded.
I crawled up under the covers as did he and we fell into a peaceful sleep.
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3am
I woke up, feeling a strange, sharp pain in my stomach and feeling like I was bleeding down in my sensitive spots.
"Ricky." I said tiredly but panic was clear in my voice.
I shook him and called his name again.
"What's wrong?" He asked groggily.
"Something's wrong." I said, panicking slightly.
"With what?" He asked, sitting up.
"The baby." I said, somewhat calmly.
"Okay. Let's go to the hospital." He said, getting up from my bed.
I got up slowly and grabbed onto Ricky as he walked me out of the room since it was painful to walk without help.
We got out to his car and the drive there was painfully quiet.
We arrived to the hospital, got checked out, and left without a baby.
I lost the baby and the parents were devastated but understood.
I was slightly crushed but it didn't affect me as bad as it could've.
"Do you still want me to stay with you tonight?" Ricky asked as we neared my room.
"Please." I said above a whisper
We laid down in my bed and he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him.
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