Bloodlust: Grayson Dolan Love Story

Chapter Thirty One: Fake Smile

𝐕𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐭
𝐌𝐚𝐲 𝟏𝐬𝐭, 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟎

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦.

I was running. I was running like my life depended on it because my life did depend on it. I heard the hiss behind me and whimpered under my breath afraid. I had nothing to protect me. If I didn't run I would be dead. Nothing could save me. In a swift motion, my legs were swung from under me and I met the bloody ground getting it on my arms, legs, face. I stared in horror. It was my own blood, wasn't it ? My screamed echoed around me before I was pulled back into the dark abyss.

I snapped out of my memory of my nightmare. It was no time to dread on the idea of dying when I was mean't to celebrate life. I glanced at Sage's present on my bed and ran my finger over the baby blue wrapping paper. Her favorite color. I tried to smile, but it never worked until I was in front of someone.

A fake smile.

In the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of a picture of him and I behind a fake plant and pencil holder on my desk. I never did remove it. Just hid it like I hid my feelings. Grayson has been gone for three months and for 77 days...it just feels empty. My safety and peace was gone. It felt as though someone punched me right in my chest and left a hole as a reminder.

I counted the hours. Then the days. Then the weeks. Then the months. I don't know if I had enough strength to count the years next. I didn't know if I could keep this act up for a year. Nothing has been the same. The first month, everyone was concern. Ethan stayed with me at night fending off the nightmares that seemed to haunt me.

By morning, Sage or Evie would come and try to get me out, but I always stayed home unless for school. Dad offered a ticket to visit Mom since she was in Orlando and thought the exposure of Florida would make me happy again, but I never went. Vera and Ezra offered their home as both shelter and warmth, but I hadn't seen them in the two months.

They all deemed me as depressed. Depression didn't feel right for me. I just felt exhaustion, irritability, anger, confusion, scared, hopeless, alone, no desire to do the shit I once loved doing. Depression is worse then just being sad. The actions of it had caused them all to perform a protective barrier around me. They were beginning to risk the things they loved doing just to watch over me and I wasn't having it.

Hence why the fake smile was placed on. Show them I still was the old me except I knew inside I wasn't the old me. I wasn't the same girl that moved back to her hometown and met the boy of her dreams. I was broken. I'll admit that much that I was Violet Steele, the broken girl.

" Morning tiny human." I heard and jumped at the sudden voice seeing Ethan at my window. He laughed at my reaction." A little jumpy we are today."

" One of these days you're going to give me a heart attack. Then what would you do?" I said reaching for my baggy flannel.

He laughed again," Don't ask me. I'm not a doctor." He teased jumping down from my window with ease.

I walked down the stairs before grabbing my bag by the door and walking down the stairs. Rounding the corner, I walked into the kitchen seeing Landon at the island table eating my cereal.

" So you move in and eat my stuff?" I teased sending him a smile.

About a month ago, Rebecca and Landon moved in with Dad and I since Dad wanted them too. So far, they weren't bad roommates. Rebecca was kind always making me a snack despite being twelve to sixteen hours in surgery. I could tell she was in love with my father and the same went vise versa. Landon was easy to live with too.