You: I'm gonna be honest. I'm starting to doubt I'm a human. Also I think I can sing now?
Fury: Congratulations, I hope you become famous.
You: No, I mean- let me rephrase. I think my life is a musical, which is why my hair and eyes are brown! (Just go with it, I probably shouldn't be giving specific features to a reader but just go with it).
Tony: That's not an emotion, that's a hallucination.
You: *clears throat* Ignorance. A common trait for rapists!
Bruce: And how exactly are WE the key to your past?
You: Well, if my people revolve around emotions then you're technically my destiny.
Bruce: And what emotion am I supposed to be?
You:...you're the Hulk, right? Anger, you genius; it's anger.
Bruce: I thought my color would be green.
You: Ironically, green is happy.
Steve: Y/N, I don't know about this.
You: Fear.
Thor: Y/N, I am proud to assist you.
You: I was gonna go with triumph but pride it is.
Loki: This is ridiculous, and I like it.
You: Didn't expect you to be excitement, but my life is full of twists and turns now.
Sam: Oh my God! I was an accomplice to rape.
You: Disgust, why not?
Bucky: I've missed so much if my life and now I'm going to help someone figure out theirs.
You: Don't be sad. I mean, you kind of have to but don't be.
Bucky: That was totally not confusing.
You: Speaking of which, who is confusion?
Peter: This makes no sense.
You: Convenience.
Nat: Well, I'm happy to help.
You:...you know you're not happiness...right?
Nat: Oh. Then who is?
You: Clint and Pietro...awwwwww.
Clint&Pietro: We are?
You: You are literally named an OTP by the universe itself.
Pietro: Cool.
Clint: Hot.
You: Not now.
Nat: So what am I left with?
You: I hate to say this, but you are the embodiment of pain.
Natasha: Pain.
Fury: Hold up, where is my emotion? And where is yours?
You: I just assumed I represented every emotion. I guess you're insignificant. Go be whatever you are I guess.
Fury: Excuse me! You do not talk to your superior like that.
You: You are not my superior and I've known you for 10 minutes.
Wade: Soooo...what now?
You: And who are you?
Tony: It's Deadpool. The merc with a mouth. He thinks he's hilarious-
You: But like a class clown when left alone, he is nothing...he is empty. The final emotion, emptiness.
Wade:...Did you get me a therapist?
5 minutes later:
Wade: Wow, and so I'm supposed to join you.
You: Weird thing is, you have no link to my past. Unless...dad?
Wade: I highly doubt I'm your father. To be fair, I am quite old. And I did have sex a lot during my high school years, and there was this chick that wanted me to run away with her. She wanted me to live in this hidden palace in a hidden location.
You: My mom. Oh my God, you're my dad!
You rush towards him in a fit of emotions and hug him, but then you tighten the hug in an attempt to hurt him.
Wade: Owwww.
You: Why the fuck did you leave me?
Wade: I didn't even know you existed.
You: Ok, but you are immortal so.
You proceed to blow him up with a bear hug; more like Bigfoot hug.
Wade: Ouch.
Peter: AAH! My shirt is ruined.
Wade: Ha. Callback.
You: So, what now?
Wade: We end this with a cliffhanger and conclude this story in the 4th or 5th part.
You: What?
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