Marvel x Male Reader (1/2)

Cheater- Part 3

You: I should take a vacay.

Peter: Really?

You: I've worked very hard for a while now and after the breakup I deserve a bit of alone time.

Peter: You do know Mr. Stark's gonna look for you, right?

You: You know what I'll do.

Peter: Why is singing always your solution?

You: It's fun. Besides it's a superpower and it's a cool one at that. Where should I go? I'll pack up first.

5 minutes later:

*knock knock*

You: Tones, if I don't let you in, you're gonna tell FRIDAY to open the door anyway so what's the point of knocking?

Tony: Jesus, you don't have to be so harsh.

You: Actually, I do and you know why, asshole.

Tony: I'm starting to think this is your fault.

You: You make me a maniac.

Tony: What?

You: You drive me crazy and the fact that you think you're right really hurts me, especially since no one's on my side. Everyone feels bad for you, but no pity for me.

Tony: Maybe there's a reason for that.

You: There probably is if a man of justice like Steve Rogers is defending you. The sad part is, I get why Steve's defending you, but I don't think everyone else has a crush on you.

Tony: What're you talking about?

You: Steve's in love with you and I pity him because you are an unfaithful piece of shit. FRIDAY, open the door; I wanna see his dumb, genius face.

Tony: *enters the room* You never seem to look at my point of view.

You: You know what? I just wanna take a break from all this drama. See you in 2 weeks.

Tony: Wait, you're leaving?

You: I'm taking a legally-required vacation.

Tony: Really? Legally-

You: I read the fine print. I'm allowed 14 vacation days every 2 years. Also, if I were looking with your point of view, chances are the only thing I'll be looking at is everybody's asses. See you soon:

Time skip because laziness:

You enter the building and notice nobody's there. They must've gone out, and you were right, they're not even here.

You: Well that shows how much they care about me.

So you sit there and watch Netflix.

4 hours later:

Tony: That was fun.

Steve: It really was *chuckle*.

Thor: I agree. It was quite enjoyable.

Clint: If Y/N was here he probably would have ruined it, that guy is so dramatic.

Peter: That's a bit harsh, don't you think? I mean, he is quite the drama king.

As tired as you were, you mustered up all your energy and hid, making sure you turned the TV off.

Tony: Let's watch some TV.

And so you hid under the couch whilst they watched The Office and F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Peter: Isn't Y/N supposed to be here?

You: I thought you expected a dramatic entrance.

Peter: AHHH! (Insert jumping)

Clint: What the fuck?!

You struggled to exit the couch but you finally did.

You: Tada. So I'm dramatic now. Ok then. Fine. I'm dramatic. I overreact, don't I? I should've forgiven Tony for his neglectfulness, cause that makes sense. I miss the days where I was just a random adult on the street who just so happened to have superpowers. Why does Fury have to be so persuasive and persistent? Funny part is that he hates me the most. Oh, I get it now. Tony wasn't in love with me. It was just that my only positive trait was that I am a great lover. Good to know I'm still lonely. Assholes. I would usually sing a song, but this is just mean. In fact, I was gonna sing "Walls could talk" but it doesn't matter cause apparently I'm dramatic. So fuck all of you and your stupid family bond. And fuck you too, Steve. Tony faked his orgasm. Don't ask me how I know. Because I'm going to remind you: I AM THE STRONGEST AVENGER! My only weakness is my low alcohol tolerance. I love crying. Because it means that I'm not giving myself any good expectations. Oh, and Steve, expect Tony to cheat on you cause having a usually flaccid penis doesn't help your case.

7 shots of vodka later:

You: Oh wow, the alcohol's really kicking in cause I'm starting to see double.

You: First a child and now a drunk.

You: I have an odd subconscious.

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