"You have to learn to die before you die. You give up, surrender to the void, to nothingness."
It's pitch black. No matter where you turn, all there is is darkness. It's silent. The only sound that can be heard is the ringing in your ears when there is nothing to be heard. You can't move. You're stuck and can't go anywhere. Where would you go even? There's nothing here. It's cold and empty. You can begin to feel your breathing become more and more difficult. You're screaming and gasping for air. But no noise escapes your mouth. It doesn't matter anyway, no one is around to hear you scream. You're trapped in this pit of nothingness, drowning in your own fear. Fears of being alone and forgotten. Fears of not being good enough and only being a burden. Fears of dying at your own hands. You want to scream and cry but you can't. You desperately want to escape and feel whole again but it's too late. The darkness has consumed you. You're trapped in your own pit of despair with no one around to save you. There's no point in trying anymore, besides who will save you now? No one. You know you could've done more to prevent this, but you ignored all the warnings. You simply didn't care about what has happened to you. You rolled with life's senseless beatings again and again. Not once did you try to get out of the vicious cycle. And because of those choices you made, you just ended digging yourself deeper and deeper into that pit of despair you now know all too well. Now your finally feeling all of the excruciating pain you've made yourself numb to over the years. You want nothing more for it to just end, to break free of this endless torment. How can you though? No one's around to hear your silent pleas for help. No one bothers to try to understand either. I mean why would they? What makes you think they'd have a change of heart now? They won't. And even if they did, do you truly believe you'd actually reach out for help? You've always thought nothing of yourself and that you aren't worth saving. Has experiencing this hell you've created changed your mind? If you truly want this dreading feeling to go away then you need to make an effort to fix it yourself. If you don't then the dreaded cycle may never end. You have to take that leap of faith if you ever hope to escape that surrounding nothingness.
YOU ARE READING
Lock Away Your Heart
RandomTW: physical abuse, self-harm, death, eating disorders Keep to yourself, don't draw in unwanted attention. Don't you dare let that cheerful attitude fade. Put on a fake smile and go about your day. No one needs to know what goes on after dark. No on...
