1. Rent a ski hill and use it to ride GT snow racers down.
The GTs would obviously be outfitted with flame decals for extra speed.
2. Install one of those vacuum tubes they use in grocery store photo labs (the one they use to send pictures from upstairs to the desk) in my house and use it to send things to myself.
Like grilled cheese sandwiches.
3. Build an ice room in my house and raise a flock of tiny penguins.
Then, I would hug them. Each one of them, individually. They will have names. And little penguin beds.
4. Construct a rather vast Beauty & the Beast type library, complete with a rolling ladder and several very large comfy chairs.
Note: I'm going to do this anyway, though I doubt it will be "vast" in proportions.
5. Hijack science and make them develop vegetables that don't taste gross.
I mean, as much as I want to protect the rare albino baby trees otherwise known as cauliflower, I might be convinced to stop my conservation efforts if it tasted like cookies.
6. Be completely self-indulgent and publish this blog as a book.
FULL CIRCLE.
7. Own and cultivate my very own sheep pasture.
All of the sheep will have names, and the gates leading to the pasture would have a tiara on them, for my true self, The Duchess.
8. Buy an amazing apartment in New York City, and spend my summers there.
I will also buy tickets to all Blue Jays/Yankees games.
9. Install a vending machine which dispenses various objects seldom found in vending machines.
Ie: Beanie Babies, small books, cassette tapes from the 1980s, pairs of socks, and scarves.
10. Actually open the joint cupcake/record shop that Laura so ingeniously suggested to me.
It would be the beginning of a new era in retail, people.
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The Duchess Lists
HumorI confess, I'm a mid-twenties pseudo-adult with a short attention span and a penchant for self-deprecation. The following stories are real and no names have been changed to protect anyone because really this is just me struggling with adulthood whil...
