Trust Once Broken | SGA John Sheppard

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Michael Cont.
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John was running late. He was supposed to be meeting Kai for dinner literally at that very moment, but he was at least a ten minute walk to the mess hall and the transporters were still down from one of McKay's 'upgrades'. Somehow in the middle of all this crap with Michael McKay had seen fit to break the entire Transporter system.

John was frustrated with himself. It wasn't like he had never been late to dinner with Kai, it was practically a regular occurrence between the two of them. One of them invariably got caught up with something, but this time felt different. They had been trying to have dinner just the two of them for over a week. Things were changing between them but now this felt like the beginning of every other relationship he had ever had. He was running in late from work convinced she was going to be pissed.

He turned the corner to the mess hall and slowed his pace when he saw Kai standing outside the door, chewing on her lip. He braced himself for her anger and approached. Years of being berated for placing work in front of a relationship had conditioned him to expect nothing less. He was the one in the wrong here, and he was prepared to face her anger.

Kai was wearing her usual casual clothes, a long sleeved black shirt and her leather pants, but she had wrapped her scarf in a different way. It seemed softer, more feminine. He wasn't sure if he should compliment it or not. If it had been a hairstyle he would have said something, but her scarf had much more of a cultural importance. John made a mental note to ask Teyla about that the next time he saw her away from Michael.

"Hey, look I'm sorry I'm late, I got caught up-"

"With Michael?" Kai asked, her clear grey eyes were open and curious, without a hint of anger.

John frowned uncertainly, not quite sure how to react. "Yeah, with Michael."

"Everything okay?" Kai asked. "Do you need to go?"

John shook his head. "No, everything should be fine for tonight," he said carefully. He wasn't quite sure what to make of Kai's calm questions. It hadn't been the reaction he anticipated at all.

"Are you okay?" Kai asked after another stretch of long silence. John was acting peculiar. She shifted her weight wondering if he had changed his mind about wanting to have dinner with her, maybe even about wanting to change the nature of their relationship.

Kai ran her hands down her thighs. She hadn't know what to wear tonight. She wasn't like Teyla, she didn't have beautiful, feminine clothes. She normally would have asked Teyla, but she was so distracted by Michael she didn't want to bother her. She also wasn't ready to discuss this with anyone else yet. Then she felt foolish for caring. John had never seemed to care what she looked like in the past, but now she wasn't so sure.

Uncertainty wasn't something Kai was used to dealing with. It was no wonder the Mortii Grand Tribunal forbade bonding and attachment. It was incredibly distracting and had Kai feeling off-kilter.

They were still new to the idea of this and Kai knew enough about policy of the expedition to know this was dangerously close to crossing the line and breaking the rules and what that could mean for John's career. She wasn't naive, she knew what she was; a ninety year old alien assassin from another galaxy, but there was something between them, and as difficult as it could be sometimes, she wasn't willing to give up on it without seeing where it could go.