1/26/20
10:48pm
Sunday
So I found this song a while ago and I liked it but never listened to it more than once. Boy do I regret that.
I think I like this song more now because back then I didn't know what agoraphobia was and I didn't know that there was a name for what I was feeling. But now that I know what it is, this song makes so much sense to me.
The lyrics "I had a dream, no
longer to be free, I want only to see four walls made of concrete, six by six, enclosed" really speaks to me. I love this song so much but it also really fucking sucks that other people feel like this.
I don't wish agoraphobia on my worst enemy.
* * *
My case of agoraphobia is based off of not wanting to be without my parents in certain situations which in turn makes me feel like a wimp.
Just the other day I was at an orchestra concert because my dad plays in the orchestra and I went with my grandparents and sister and i don't know, I guess the thought of something bad happening was bothering me and I didn't feel like anyone I was with could do anything to help me. Only my parents could?
Yea...
I often think that my head is going to stop working too. Like I'll be feeling real bad and then I guess I'm afraid I'll have a complete break from reality or something.
When I feel like that I just want to be in a small room that's enclosed and safe. Ya know?
That's one of the reasons the song agoraphobia is so relatable.
~Cherry🖤
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I Might Set Fire to This Later
Non-FictionThis book is going to be like my journal. It's going to be very personal. Like a walk through my mind. I'm challenging myself to just write with no filter. To get my thoughts out. I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR TRIGGERS. You could say it's a get to...
