It does, yeah. I cut about two inches down on my right wrist with a broken bottle—not a good tool for the job. I was a very, very sad person. Things are much better now.
The thing I found was that it hurts pretty constantly—a very sharp, local burn. We use our hands much more than we even may realize, so there's all kinds of muscles and tendons at work.
I'm not an expert, and never will be—I don't know the anatomy. But in my experience, with such a terrible choice for a cutting tool, I really had to go to work on it. It was an awful feeling. The gas was wide and deep. The skin puffed up around the cut like ridges—it was just a total nightmare.
It's a terrible thing, what we do to ourselves sometimes. I may never know why, but certain people seem to be burdened with more than they can stand. The only thing I know for sure, is that help is available in almost all cases. We're getting much better at dealing with these things, I think—I hope we're beginning to understand more about depression and suicide risks.
If you're hurt or hurting, I know how it is. Your life is important. It sounds shallow to hear it when you're in the middle of things. Everything sounds dull and dumb and trite. But if you can, if you CAN . . . please do reach out. I can't guarantee that things will get better quickly. But I can guarantee that you are important. We all are. I had to learn that myself. In the worst way.
And now look at me. I found a medication that changed everything. We're going to get there—I think we should talk to each other more. The Truth is never the wrong answer. Ever.
•b18
YOU ARE READING
I Might Set Fire to This Later
Non-FictionThis book is going to be like my journal. It's going to be very personal. Like a walk through my mind. I'm challenging myself to just write with no filter. To get my thoughts out. I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR TRIGGERS. You could say it's a get to...
