Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.
- Anthony J. D'Angelo
Life has never been easy or simple for Ellie. She was born deformed, the outcast of her pack, abused and shunned. She spends her life running fro...
"Anxiety happens when you think you have to figure out everything all at once. Breathe. You're strong. You got this. Take it day by day."
– Karen Salmansohn
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Jen showed me all around the beautiful mansion, but I cut off the tour a little short because I was feeling strangely tired all day today and didn't quite have the energy to keep up with her extremely excitable attitude.
I didn't understand why I felt this way. For a few weeks now I've felt like I have a leak or something and all of my will to do anything other than sleep and occasionally watch Netflix was just leaking out of me.
I just shook it off and took naps but the worse it got the more concerned I couldn't help but be. Normally I would endure long, excruciating hours of torture and then proceed to clean the entire pack house and cook diner. I was becoming soft and I was very unsure whether or not it was a good thing.
Today I felt a little dizzy too and decided maybe it was because I was hungry. I hadn't eaten in a little while and my body was much more used to getting food regularly. My appetite hadn't been great lately but I managed to force down a sandwich before heading to bed.
It was about 4:00 in the morning and I was lying awake, unable to sleep. I was sharing a room with Jen who was sleeping peacefully beside me. Even though my body was screaming at me for sleep I just couldn't bring myself to drift off. It was like I was overflowing with caffeine and my mind wouldn't shut up, but the only thing I'd been drinking was water and the only thing I'd eaten was half a ham sandwich.
I tried everything; counting sheep, singing to myself, even synching my breathing with Jen's to try and relax but just couldn't fall asleep.
Getting frustrated with my inability to fall asleep I wanted to scream, but deciding that wouldn't be a good idea, I made my way down to the kitchen. Luckily, I easily remembered exactly where I was going. Part of bounty hunter training was working on your sense of direction and quickly being able to adapt to your environment and blend in.
I was hoping some water would help, maybe a decaf coffee.
Luckily I've always been a quiet walker, never wanting to anger my parents. I easily crept through the house and down the stairs, not one floor board cracking, and not one door screeching.
I filled a glass with water and settled down at the counter, trying to force some down. Water is the answer to everything, it really could only help. I couldn't help but feel repulsed as I felt it glide down my throat and the next thing I knew I was sprinting clumsily over to the closest bathroom where I threw up everything left in my stomach.
I sat on the cold tiled floor, trying to breathe through the nausea, resting my head against the nearby cupboards.
What the hell is going on with me? I couldn't have been poisoned, I have an extremely high tolerance to almost every poison imaginable thanks to both my parents and bounty hunter training. I weakly hobbled my way back to bed, holding my burning stomach, and I finally drifted off into an uneasy sleep.
