He pushed me up against the wall.
"We cant do this." I said.
"Why not?" He said while kissing my neck.
My breathing hitched, "You..you know why."
"No one has to know." I could practically hear the smirk coming from his mouth
"Its still not right." That was the only excuse I had to offer because to be honest, I wanted this. Every part of me wanted this...but was this my hormones talking or something stronger?
He ignored my reasoning and continued placing kisses from my neck up all the way up to the corners of my mouth. I braced myself for what was to come next.
His mouth met mine. A slow, soft kiss placed sweetly on my lips. I responded automatically and within seconds the kisses intensified. His arms wrapped around me, my fingers entangled in his hair. I broke the kiss. We were looking into each others' eyes, foreheads touching, gasping for air. I closed my eyes, "Im so sorry Dalton." I pushed him away before he had time to react to my words and ran towards the door.
I was halfway out the door when I felt him grasp my hand. "Wait."
I turned to face him, "Dalton-"
He cut me off, "Dont go."
"You're drunk and Im not gonna be your one night stand just because we've done it before."
The expression on his face looked like I had just slapped him. I instantly regretted what I had said. I didnt mean the words..I just needed to get him to let me go.
"Is that all you think you are?" The hurt in his voice was clear.
"Im sorry, I didnt-" he stopped me again.
"After all these years Lyrie, thats how you think I really feel about you?" The hurt had turned to anger.
It shocked me for a second but then I remembered something, "Oh come on Dalton, you cant tell me things werent different after we started messing around regularly. Do you remember the first time we slept together? Now compare that to all the other times." I was now getting upset.
"You're right, it was different. I had to hide my feelings after the first time. Do you have any idea how many times I just wanted to tell you that I loved you and how great it was to finally be with you? But I couldnt. You know why? Because I knew you'd pull away. I heard what you said about being cut off to love and I get it, you're scared because of your parents. So, I kept my mouth shut and was there for you in whatever way you needed me. Just keeping it physical was the hardest thing I've ever had to do but I did it because it made you feel better."
I stood there trying to comprehend what he was saying. No, you dont get to do this. You dont get to be the one upset. "Thats not even fair and you know it. My parents are possibly getting a divorce, how do you expect me to believe in love after that? Do you have any idea how screwed up I am now? How I cant even look at myself in the damn mirror and see what I've become."
"I didnt expect you to and I dont hold it against you but how could you even think for one second that you didnt mean anything, that us being together didnt mean anything. I love you Lyrie. Dammit, Im in love with you. You're not just some fucking girl. You werent just some girl on the swings. You werent just some girl in Florida, you werent just some girl at the wedding and you damn sure werent just some girl the night we first slept together."
I couldnt believe what I was hearing. Dalton, in love with me? I cant do this right now.
"How can you stand there and say those things knowing whats at risk? We cant be together. We're friends, best friends. Thats all we are ever going to be able to be. We cant do this, you know that. Its doesnt matter how we feel."
"Umm, Lyrie wait-"
"No let me finish. I meant it when I ended things. We just cant-"
"What the hell is going on." I was interrupted by another voice.
Please for the love of all the stars in the galaxy, dont let that be who I think it is.
I turned to see the one person in the world I didnt want to see right now, Brady. "Whats over? What the hell cant you do?"
"Brady, this isnt what it looks like. How much did you hear?" Way to go with the cliches Lyrie.
His eyes were dead set on Dalton, "What the fuck is going on. Tell me now."
Dalton came forward, "Im sorry man."
Brady looked at me, "How could you? He's my best friend."
"What?" Realization was hitting me. He's blaming me.
I ran out of there trying to keep the tears from spilling out of my eyes. I made it outside and was about to start walking home when I saw Clayton and Tyler getting in a car. I went up to them, "Are you guys leaving?"
Clayton was in the passenger seat and Tyler was driving. Clayton answered me, "Yeah we're going to pick up Boyer."
"Mind taking me home?"
"Whats the matter?"
"Not now, please I just need a ride home." My voice broke at the last word.
"Yeah, get in the car." Tyler answered.
I directed them towards my house and got out of the car. "Go pick up Boyer and come back for me. Im gonna talk to Lyrie," Clayton had told Tyler before following me to my front porch. "Okay, now whats going on?"
I started bawling and told him everything. It felt good to get it all off my chest. "Please dont say anything though."
"Wow, I would have never guessed any of that. Holy shit Lyrie, you and Dalton? Well damn. Brady will come around though, he's probably just surprised. And you've got my word, I wont say anything."
"You didnt see the way he looked at me, I think he hates me." I screwed up so badly.
He offered me a hug, "Its gonna be alright. Brady cant hate you, just give it a few days."
Tylers car pulled up, "Thanks Clayton, for everything."
He got up to leave and gave me one last hug, "No problem. I love you Lyrie. Its gonna be okay."
"I love you too," I said as he left.
I went to my room and collapsed in my bed, ready to cry myself to sleep. My best friend hates me and its all my fault. Im in love with my other best friend and its killing me. What a lovely mess I've made.
