Scars (SayWeCanFly Fanfiction)

Mom and Victoria

I have been released for a day and last night Braden and I didn't get any sleep but he's so worth it, Braden is such a great father and never wants to let him go, today Braden and I decided to go to my mom's so she can see Lincoln I lay in bed with Braden and Lincoln and Braden is sleeping with Lincoln on top of Braden's stomach sleeping too and I grab my phone and take a picture and then call up my mom and sit in the living room so I do awake Braden or the baby "hello?" she answers "hey mom" I answer back "Emma! how have you been?, when are you gonna come visit me" I think she was a little happy and I giggle "I umm had the baby and wondering if it was okay if I could come over for you to see him" I said "of course it's totally okay" she replied once I finished my sentence and I smiled I don't ever want to push her away again I just hope she really changes for good like she says, she promised to change before and only changed for a couple days and go right back to being her and I hate that part of her "Well I am gonna go wake Braden and get ready and head that way, I love you mom" I told her "I love you too sweetie" and I hung up the phone and walked into the bedroom where nothing changed and carefully got Lincoln of the stomach of Braden and put Lincoln in his crib in his room and came back to Braden and kissed his lips and his eyes opened and he looked and me and smiled and pulled me to him and kissed me back "that has got to be the best way you've ever woken me up" he said and I blush "we're going to my moms so she can see Lincoln if that's okay with you" I told him and he sat up in the bed stretching "of course I don't mind, why would I mind?" he asked me "I was just wondering" I said "Honey, I am not the type of husband you have to get permission about for everything, especially going to go see your mom, I trust you, I only ask to participate if I can, and if I can't just let me know when you leave you don't even have to say where, just don't go do something that put's you in danger" he told me and I hugged him "I love you Braden Barrie, you know that?" and he chuckled "I was hoping you did" he said and he kissed my nose "just know I am going to love you ten times more Emma Alexandra Wilde Barrie" he said using my maiden name and my new last name I go to my closet and decide to wear a white tanktop with some dark jeans and black flip flops and have my hair down and it's naturally straight so I brush my hair and go to see if Braden is dressed and seen him in a black t-shirt and some black skinny jeans he wore his glasses and his new beanie I bought him because he had been talking about a new one for forever and since I bought it he wore it every time he had the chance, I go into Lincoln’s room where he begins to cry and Braden comes up behind me and hold my hips and whispers in my ear “I got this” I smile and move out of the way and get his baby bag together while Braden changed his diaper “ready?” I asked he nodded and we walked out of the apartment and Braden put Lincoln in his car seat and I got in the drivers seat and then when Braden buckled up Lincoln he got in the passenger seat and he headed towards my moms house

I knock on the door with the baby bag on my shoulder and Lincoln in his carseat which was held by Braden and my mom opened the door and raided me with a big hug and kisses on my cheek “I missed you so much” she then headed for Braden and I grabbed the carseat and walked in and looked back and she was hugging and kissing him too I am glad my mom has accepted him, I mean by now she should we’re married and have a child now I go into the kitchen and see Victoria with Sadie in a high chair and a play pen with a little boy I recognized as my nephew Tyler “Vic?” I said when I seen her she looked pretty she had on black skinny jeans with fuzzy boots with her pant legs stuffed in them with a red sweater that fit her perfectly she had died her hair dark brown and she had the tips curled she smiled especially when she seen me carrying a carseat “Emm” she said and got up and hugged me and took the carseat and sat it on top of the table and took out Lincoln and held him “Oh my gosh he’s the cutest what’s his name?” just then my mom and Braden walked in “His name is Lincoln” and my mom had a tear running down her face “You named him after your father?” she asked “Once I fount out it was a boy I was gonna name him after daddy somehow” I said and hugged her “when he died I told myself my son was going to be named after him” I told her “Does little Lincoln have a middle name?” Victoria asked and I turned around and Braden put his hand behind my back pulling me in and I laid my head on his shoulder “Chord” I said “Lincoln Chord Barrie, I love it, especially Chord, because Braden is a musician so creative” she said “Can I hold him?” my mom asked and Victoria smiled and handed her Lincoln and my mom began crying again “I hope those are happy tears” I said “Yes they are” she said rocking him and I walked over to Tyler and picked him up and spun around “I haven’t seen him since he was born, he’s getting so big” I said she smiled “And looking more like his daddy everyday” she said it sucks Tyler and Sadie weren’t ever going to see their dad again, I know how it feels but I am glad they’re too young to understand and not like me and understood everything that happened, I remember when my dad died, at the time my dad was unemployed and my mom and Tyler were working and I was at school and it was an early release day they always had early release days on Wednesday I knew when I came home dad would be cooking while watching the football game he missed that Sunday when I got home the house was quiet I was shocked this was the time dad was in the kitchen cooking and the game on I walked into the kitchen and my dad wasn’t in there so I yelled out “Dad!, I’m home” and no answer I go to the living room and it was empty like no one was in there usually there would be a butt print on dad’s old armchair but there wasn’t I went upstairs into his bedroom and seen he was laying in it I giggled “Come on Dad let’s watch some football” I said and went to him and he was covered in blood my happy face became a horrid face and I began shaking him “dad? DAD!?!” I screamed and seen a bullet hole in the side of his head “NO!!” I yelled and began hysterically crying then someone grabbed me from behind and covered my mouth I was screaming to the top of my lungs but no one could hear me, even if someone was home he picked me up and ran to my room and threw me on my bed his face was covered up and he wore all black and he pointed the gun at me “shut up!” he yelled and I did but still crying “please don’t kill me” I pleaded “You have to give me something then” he said “take anything” I said he put his gun down and took his mask off his eyes were a dark brown and he had a chiseled jaw he had a 5 o’clock shadow at the time I didn’t know what was I was still laying on my bed when he got on the top of me and put a finger on my mouth “shh” he said and took off my pants and underwear and his pants… he raped me afterwards he told me if I told he would come back and kill me once he left I sat in the corner of my room my knees to my face and I rocked back and forth crying finally someone came home and I recognized the voice, Tyler I threw on my pants and ran downstairs crying “what’s wrong? what’s wrong” Tyler asked twice “Daddy!” I yelled still crying he picked me up and ran to dad’s room and seen dad was dead he began crying and pulled out a phone “who are you calling?” I asked him wiping the tears from my face “the police, did you see the person?” he asked me the phone to his ear I understood what sex was since it was forced into my brain not to have it and I was told in detail what it was at the age of nine at that time rape was a common thing in our town and my mom wanted me to understand what it was and how it was bad “he made me have sex with him” I told Tyler his eyes widened and he began talking on the phone 12 minutes later people were surrounding my house talking and the EMT’S were taking my dad away I remember I had told the police what he looked at and they caught him two days later and they solved 4 murders at 2 rapes when they caught him I went to therapy for years for the death of my father and for being raped but one day the guy escaped and was fount dead when they caught up to him because he was about to snatch up a little girl and her father aimed and fired and I was relived I never had to worry he was going to come get me again I have never told anyone I was raped not even Brandon or Braden but I think I want to tell Braden, I can tell him anything but I don’t want him thinking I want a pity party, that’s the last thing I want, to be the center of attention, I put Tyler down into the playpen and pick up Sadie and begin tickling her and she would cackle she was the cutest, we stayed for about three hours before we went back home and I laid down Lincoln in his crib and cuddled up to Braden on the couch “I am curious” Braden said “About?” I asked him “You don’t have to tell me, I noticed you never talk about it but, how did your dad die?” he asked me “he was murdered, shot in the head, I seen him first and the guy who killed him was still in the house and he umm… raped me” I said letting it all out “Oh my gosh, and you were ten and all of that happened in one day?” he asked “Yeah..” he pulled me in “don’t worry I will protect you, no one is ever going to hurt you with you by my side” he said “I know and that’s why I am not scared anymore” and I looked up at him and kissed him this is where I am supposed to be, I am not the scared, suicidal girl I once was, I am now the happy, bubbly girl I get to be I have a great husband, a wonderful son, I look back on everything that has happened and it all started at a concert, yes, I have scars but they’re there for a reason, they represent the past, the way I used to be, the way I will never be again, I am even happier knowing I have the rest of my life to look forward to, with Braden and Lincoln, my mom, my niece and nephew, Victoria, Charlie, and future children, I think of that and smile knowing the dark days are behind me and the sun is shining toward the future the scars represent my past and my smile represent my future