Broken Halves

Chapter Fifteen

POV: Cole

Rubbing my hands down my face, I release a sigh of exhaustion and frustration. What have I become? Previously, I sat here and preached up and down the wall that I was better than those men who are out there slaughtering each other; but, isn't that what I am doing now?

For the next three years, I have to slay the souls of innocent men and condemn them to an afterlife of nothing, every man's worst nightmare; but yet I continue. I love Dani. I love my pack and my brother but yet, is my happiness worth the eternal deaths of my brethren? Throwing a punch at the cement wall, I allow physical pain to soothe the mental guilt I am suffering from.

"Abaddon," someone calls from behind my curtain, ending my attack on the wall. "You have a visitor." Furrowing my eyebrows in confusion, I slide the curtain to the side revealing a man and a cloaked woman. Nodding at the man, signaling his dismissal, I usher the women into my temporary home.

"Who are you?" I question, far from in the mood to deal with visitors. My guest only removes her hood, revealing her identity to me. Sinking to my knees, I speak instantly. "My Goddess, to what do I owe this honor?" Keeping my head bowed and eyes lowered, I wait for her to respond.

"I could sense your distress Alpha." She admits after a few minutes of silence to which she roams around my room. "I came to help soothe your mental pain." She takes a seat on my battered mattress as shame and guilt flood through my system. "I am sorry My Goddess for burdening you." I mumble out after a while; she is the supreme being of an entire race and has much more important matters to attend to then my wallowing. "Nonsense Alpha," she responds only causing the guilt and shame to intensify.

My heart begins to pound, and the sound of rushing water overtakes my senses. "Alpha, look up." The Moon Goddess' commanding voice leaves me with no choice but to look up into her crystal clear blue eyes. Laying a tender hand of comfort on my cheek, she begins to talk. "Cole, you are a good man with a good heart but in order to survive here you need to become the warrior that lives inside of you; the one you've always been training to be." Her finger trails the length of my cheek and falls upon the scar that lays on the underside of my chin.

"When you led your pack to battle against the Hunters, you held no regrets and showed no mercy. If you truly want to return home to your mate and your people, then you must fight with no regrets and show no mercy like I know you can; I didn't choose you all those year ago because you can't Colton." Her words spark a stirring in my heart and I can't help but frown, I pulled away from my responsibilities when I met my mate, and that alone makes me not worthy enough to regain my title.

"Let them fear you." The Moon Goddess continues, pulling me from my thoughts. "Live up to the name that they have given you." She removes her hand from my face and brings it down to jab her finger against my chest, right over my heart. "Unleash your inner beast and become Abaddon." The Moon Goddess shifts her position and leans down so we are eye level. "For years you have been training and sparring to become one of the youngest, strongest, most feared Alphas; do not lose it now." My mind begins to tingle and memories from my past, of the unstoppable fighter I was, flash through my mind.

"You are still Alpha Colton Richards, Alpha of the Blood Moon pack and heir to the Du Val throne." The Moon Goddess' voice is strong and I am reminded that she is a leader much like I am; calm and commanding all the while vicious and deadly when need be. "You have always slain any enemy who was unfortunate enough to cross your path Cole. Time and time again you have fought and rose the victor; do not end it now." My heart lurches and my hand begins to ache for a sword as if I was a teenager again.

"Meeting your mate calmed your beast and intensified your tender side. You ignored your past and focused on your future. However, in order to return back to her, you must once again be one with your inner warrior. Become the one whose name will send them shaking with terror." With a grip one would have not assumed, The Moon Goddess grasps my chin and tilts my head backwards so I am staring into her hard set, icy, blue eyes.

"Become Abaddon. He can not only live in the arena Cole, he must also live in your heart." Releasing me from her grasp, she continues. "Do not forget your love, let it fuel you, let it fuel Abaddon." Stepping back, The Moon Goddess allows me space to process her words. She's right. My whole life I have been training to become the warrior who gave me my reputation and responsibilities in the land of the living. For years, I have taken down anyone who has dared to harm my pack, my family. Right now, I do not need to be the lover Dani sees fore she is not here to witness it anyway. In order to return to her, I need to allow my love to fuel my heart and become the warrior I have always been.

As if I have suddenly been awakened, I know how I must proceed. In order be a fair, just, Alpha once again, I must become what my elders have always groomed me to be. Whereas, I was taught to become an Alpha who always held his people in his heart, at the same time, I underwent years of training to ensure that I could protect them, no matter the cost. This is for my people. They rely on me, they need me. I will not abandon them like my father before me. From this day forward I am Abaddon; body and soul. Those at the arena have given me this name and now it is time for me to live up to it just as I have done in my past. Dani, Jorden, people of Blood Moon, I am coming home to you. Do not worry, for your Alpha will return to you; Abaddon will insure it.

Looking up once again, I lock eyes with the crystal clear blue ones of my Goddess. She smiles at me upon seeing the determination and fire sparkling in my own eyes. "Who are you Cole?" She asks. "Abaddon, My Goddess." Her smile intensifies, "And why are you here Abaddon?" With no hesitation I respond, "To fight, My Goddess." "Good..." She purrs while tracing her finger down the center of my chest. "Answer me this Abaddon, why is it that you fight?" Hardening my voice, I allow my heart to shine and fuel my response. "I fight Goddess because my people need me. It is my destiny to return to the realm of the living to be reunited with my mate so we can lead our people together." The Moon Goddess smiles and steps back from me once again.

"Very good Alpha, I believe you are ready. Before I release you, I have one last thing to ask. Does Cole still control your head and heart?" "Always Goddess," Is out of my mouth the moment her last word was out of hers. "I will never allow the warrior to completely consume me. Never before, have I allowed that to happen. I will allow Abaddon to be on the surface simply because I know Abaddon is who will get me back to my family, where I can once again be their fair, just, and trustworthy Alpha."

"You truly are a remarkable soul Alpha Cole." The Goddess smiles with pride shining in her blue eyes. "With all of the power you are capable of you never abuse it." Her voice holds a hint of fascination and I begin to feel uncomfortable with her tone. "You truly are one of the best Alphas I have ever had the pleasure of ruling over." Gently, the Goddess caresses my face once again, "You have made me proud Alpha, and Abaddon is no exception; he only fuels what lies inside your pure heart." "Go out there now Alpha and fight. Fight so you can return home and continue to be one of the best that will ever walk among us."

Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and allow the words of My Goddess to float through me. "Dani baby, I will return to you. I promised you that I would never leave you, and that my love, is a promise I will keep."

My name is Colton Dalton Richards, but here they call me Abaddon, and you are about to understand why.

Question of the Day: How do you think this will affect Cole mentally?

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