Papa can I kill you

Chapter 3

I have noticed a few things while my life in the crib has been going around. The people here are not very normal. I mean in the sense that they don't have your usual sense of awareness. They all seem to be relaxed or way too carefree like there is no danger in the world. It makes me a little envious of them. I wish I could be unaware of the things around me, if it's now then maybe I can but now is meaningless. Anyway, I have surprising news for anyone which is practically no one to hear. After my thorough investigation around this place I have discovered something quite damning, there are no guards here to protect me. Yes, you read it right, there are no guards to protect this place, not even any on patrol. You're basically asking yourself to be taken away for ransom, killed on the spot, or something even worse that I have yet to think of.

Now here pops the second question. Why am I mentioning such specific random things that may or may not happen when I can just say bad things will happen? Well, all of it correlates to this one situation I'm in, funny right...it's not? Well too bad you're dealing with my humor so get used to it or leave...no pressure...really no pressure just be sure to check that all your doors in each room are locked, just a helpful tip.

Anyway back to the topic at hand, I'm currently being kidnapped by a robber. A robber that has, I must quote 'no fashion sense and only likes to wear depressing colors of death.' This is what one of my friends would say to me anytime I wore complete black and I'm always way too lazy to argue back.

Anyways this robber is very freaking dumb by coming here alone. Keywords alone, he's an idiot, or maybe I'm the idiot to let him kidnap me this easily. 'Oh well, it's just one robber if I play my cards right I may be able to escape with no injuries.' I began to secretly plan for something mischievous or devious give or take.

'Wait, wouldn't getting out of here be the best, cause now I won't have to kill or get killed.' Though I'm still a baby that only recently knew how to crawl. It's hard to stand and walk ok. Babies are weak in their own ways and strong in another. 'Don't judge even if you're the parent. Especially if you're the parent then give your baby a chance to prove itself before criticizing it.' Back to topic. I will most likely die if I go outside in my current state so that means whether I like it or not I will need to stay here and hope for the best. And pray that my father doesn't decide to get rid of me one day or night.

I started making some baby noises to catch the robber's attention and the result was so effective that the robber flinched at the sudden noise like he heard a ghost. I couldn't help but inwardly laugh at my antics. 'I've seen my eyes once and they look pretty terrifying in a weird standard. I could probably use that to my advantage.' Honestly, this poor robber is suffering more from me than I am from him. I may not like these eyes of mine but if it were a dar, creepy, echoey night, like now then it would really be quite a scare. I am grinning all the deviousness inside me.

I pulled at the robber's clothes lightly and he looked down at me and ever so slowly I turned my head to look at him, eyes wide with the want and need to kill. The poor guy got so scared he threw me in the air like I was the evil incarnate and screamed for his life. 'That could've gone better but honestly, that reaction was great!' I was grinning ear to ear as I felt the force of gravity sending me back down. I close my eyes and got caught by- Who do you guess? Choice one, somebody- choice two, a guard, or choice three my nanny well for those of you answering choice four congrats you win absolutely nothing.

I got caught by my father and he looked at me either bored or slightly confused. "Now this is odd. Never caught a baby from the sky." Now I was just irked. How dare he! 'Be happy you caught a baby like me from the sky! Where yeomna sent me to kill you!' Wow, I need to tone it down by a few notches. Also, I'm amazed by the way he's carrying me. He's carrying me the right way a baby should be carried and not choking my neck. This is a grace from above. 'Oh gosh, I will most likely never get a chance like this again.'