Papa can I kill you

Chapter 31

I woke up in the middle of the night bored out of my mind. 'I want to take a walk.' I got out of bed, walking to the door, and placing my ear next to it. I listened for any movements. 'Are they asleep, or maybe there off duty? Nah, that seems too easy.' Going with my gut, I walked to my window, and using the chair I had placed near it a while back, I climbed onto it and opened the window. I didn't notice till now, but I'm on the first floor, of course, there's grass below me. 'This will be my great escape!' I looked around the room, trying to find something that I can tie around the chair and use as a rope. I looked under my bed and found a pretty silk scarf that I have no idea when it got under there. Actually, the more I look, the more I see stuff placed under the bed. 'When did I put so many things under here. I'll need to clean it out later.' I tied the scarf to the back of the chair and let it hang down the window. More than enough for me to use as a rope.

I climbed up the window sill and grabbed ahold of my makeshift rope, giving it a few tugs for safekeeping. I leaned back slowly, using the rope as support, and started climbing. One step at a time, I climbed my way down. 'It's a lot easier to do when you're not scared out of your wits from something that looks twice as big as you.' I knew the ground wasn't that high, but my head loves to perceive things differently. Anyway, I walked around the grassy ground and onto the corridor. 'I can't stay out for too long, or Hilana will be furious and worried to death.' I continued my night stroll but soon went on my hands and knees, crawling my way around. I'm sorry ok, but walking is such a pain! Even though I can and could, it's tiring to do.

I stopped crawling when I saw someone sitting on what seemed to be a large bonsai tree. It had the typical shape of a bonsai tree with the layered branching and trees, but the trunk itself was slanted in a way where you can lay there like it's a bed, and that's what they're doing right now. I sneaked closer and found it to be my father, who currently has his eyes closed. 'Crap, time to run!' I was prepared to turn and run but couldn't help but stare for just a while longer. It's not the first time I've seen him sleep, but it's not often I see him at all. 'Honestly, if he was like this every day, then my time would be heaven.' I should hate him, and I do. I still want to kill him, especially after what he did to me, but a part of me just refuses to go through with it. I don't know why and can't tell if it's me or someone else. 'If only you weren't such a murderous jerk, I wouldn't have the need to end your life.' I mentally sighed, wondering how bullshit fate has it for me.

I got ready and turned right back around, crawling away, "Come here." but got stopped by him calling me out. 'Well, there goes my run away.' I turned around and found my father sitting up and looking down at me. I got back on my feet and walked up to him. He picked me up and set me down next to him. Then there was silence. 'Awkward, but that's a given with our current predicament.' I glanced up at him occasionally to see if there was any change in his face but nothing.

"You should've been dead." He said out of nowhere, and I looked ahead with wide eyes. 'Ok, wow, right off the bat, we're going there. At least he's blunt, I think?' I was not mentally prepared, apparently. "You were never supposed to live," He looked down at me as I stared up at him. Once again, there's a sadness in his eyes that seems to want to shout something. Still, I feel like that's wrong, and honestly, I probably am half the time. "however, that peyl woman can only have it her way." I'm guessing the woman we're talking about is my mother. 'Well can't say I didn't call it. With how he talks about her, can't tell if he loves her or absolutely annoyed by her. Probably both.' I looked away and back in front to the sight of trees and the sound of the ocean water. "If you were going to look like her, then at least do it all the way. That syvel half-assed resemblance ruins it all." He mumbled out, and I rolled my eyes over at him as he moved my hair away from my face. 'It's gotten pretty long. I don't think hair should be growing this fast.' "It's ridiculous even for me, but If you were gone. Would they be back? Would I see them tomorrow? Hear them bicker and complain to no end while bothering me nonetheless?" His voice had become quiet and lost. He wasn't talking to me anymore, just to himself now. 'They? I'm sure that still includes my mother, but who else is there.' I faced him again and wished I could speak to him in a way that is coherent. 'Wait, I already blew my cover that night. There is no way he's dumb enough to think his year old child is coherent enough to process human speech. I mean, he's raised a kid before!' I thought, not fully paying attention to him. "Unfortunately, you resemble her a little too much in both ways. I guess it doesn't matter if they're gone. They'll still haunt me like a curse." Now he's sighing and looking drained or tired, and I finally made up my mind.