Papa can I kill you

Chapter 15

I floated in a blanket of infinite darkness with no light in sight. I felt scarcely calm and that's what terrifies me the most. It's as if I'm giving up on resisting and resigned to accept whatever comes my way. 'Someone please let me out. I don't like this darkness.' This complete darkness brought back memories of that dark room. A room with no light, no escape, and potential death at every side. It's a fear I can never forget nor is it one I can ever erase.

I opened my eyes to see grey. I got up from my bed and looked around to find myself lying in a grey and white canopy bed that was placed in the middle of the wall, the room overall plain. My immediate thought was 'Am I dead?' but that quickly dispersed from my head, for the fact that I was still thinking. 'I must've moved to a new place. I wonder where I am? Oh well, I like this place quite a bit so I'll just stay here.' I laid back on my bed and let out a sigh. 'I really hoped this phobia of mine wouldn't follow me but it appears mental problems always stick.' I don't know if I can handle complete dark spaces in this life. Thankfully I'm not shoved into a windowless room so that's a plus for me.

I got out of bed because I couldn't sleep. I pulled up a chair and placed it next to the window. At least with this place, it's at ground level so I can escape through the window. I looked out the night sky to see the stars and moon. 'The moon here is so big and bright.' I went back to sleep after doing some moon viewing. I never got the chance to do any moon-viewing so might as well do it now.

I woke up the next morning and got informed by Avia. So apparently the place I'm staying at is the Syva1 palace and it really loves calm tones. No gold, no silver, just big spaces, and a little bit of design. Avia did take me around Syva palace for a stroll and one word for this place is calmness. Staying here is like meditating for a better way to put it. After taking a full scan of my room it was pretty nice looking. A grey and white canopy bed in the middle, a window on the left a wardrobe on the right side wall, makeup table on the right, overall plain. The color of the walls was a dark grey purple more on the grey side though, and a fireplace on the other side of the bed.

If I had to compare the palaces I've been in then Syva palace goes calm, and light. Harmon palace is more bright with designs. Then there was the Rose(1) palace a definition of a true royal palace filled with bold colors and the gold. The freaking gold! There was so much gold that I was feeling sick from looking at it! If I had to choose between the three palaces I would definitely choose this one. 'Syva palace maybe my dream palace.'

Hilana came in greeting me for the day. "How about we take a walk princess." I nodded my head and Hilana carried me in her arms. We headed out of the room and walked around the palace. I have to admit I still feel a little awkward around Hilana after what happened yesterday. I love my nanny but it can't be the same as before. 'Some things just aren't meant to be and hopefully, this old wound will disappear with time.' That's a complete lie to comfort my pitiful self. We all do it.

Hilana stopped in her tracks and bowed to the person in front of her. I looked up to find the lady from last time. "Greetings Lady Veira." My nanny politely said to her. Lady Veira ignored my Nanny and looked at me. She gave me a quick bow and quickly left but I saw the look she gave me. The look of jealousy. 'I can't tell which one that is directed to? Me or my mom. It has to be one of those because choice three would be her simply hating my existence as a whole. That seems plausible after all I'm the spawn of the underworld that's here to take the overdue life of my father...I need help.'

"Princess don't learn to ignore others, that's considered rude but learn to ignore the povates(2)." I still don't understand the language here but I can tell my Nanny is a bit pissed and she cursed in front of a child, I think. 'Note to self stay away from Hilana's bad side.' I had to keep a mental note of that. 'Maybe what happened yesterday had affected both of us. Just maybe.' We walked along the arcade that was still covered in snow but the bits of light that managed to get in made it look ethereal-wrong word it was more like calming fantasy-wait that's the same thing. I give!