~Anxiety~Christian Akridge AKA Christian Leave (fanfict)

Chapter 7

"Oh yeah I should give you my new number," Christian says, "Can I see your phone," he asks, reaching his muscular hand across the table. "Here," I hand it to him.

Shit my background is of us....

"So you did see the picture of us I posted on Instagram?" he shows me my wallpaper. "Yeah, well, I don't have an account, Casey screen shot it for me and I've kept it ever since," I feel my face turn bright red. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone and hands it to me. I press the home button to turn it on. "I-it's the same picture," I smile. "Yeah" he smiles handing me back my phone. We order the food and after waiting for awhile it is delivered to us. "I am just ganna go to the bathroom," I discreetly stand up and leave. I get into the bathroom and sit down on the toilet. I don't even have to go, I just need to take a breath. I found what I have been waiting for for 11 months and six days today. I had a full course meal today already and now I am about to have another.

I am already so heavy, do I really need another meal? I can't just leave Christian here though, he has done so much for me. I owe this to him. I look down at my thighs, I don't even have a gap. I feel hot tears roll down my cheeks, I don't deserve Christian, he deserves someone who already loves herself and doesn't need to be told that she is beautiful. I shouldn't have to be told that I am beautiful by this boy just to be happy. I need to think that I am beautiful, but I can't. I wish I could, but it is so impossible. I have to go back to the table now, I don't want him to worry about me.

I shakily walk back to the table. "Hey what took you so long? Its almost been ten minutes," Christian asks. "Oh I just got lost on the way there," I giggle and try to hid my emotion and thankfully, he laughs too. The steak I ordered is sitting in front of me, ready to be eaten. I don't know if I can do this. I pick up the fork and knife resting on each side of my plate. I see Christian look at my shaking hands. "Remember what I said outside," he looks at me in the eye. "Okay," I say silently while I begin to cut a small piece of steak. I slowly bring the piece to my face and bite it off the fork. I awkwardly put the fork and knife down to finish chewing. Every so often I see Christian look up at me.

When our meal was finally over we go outside into the cold. "Its snowing," I laugh catching snowflakes in my hand. "Yeah," Christian smiles at the sky as snowflakes land on his face, then looks back down at me. I want to kiss him again and make out with him like we did the first time I met him. "Come here," he takes my hand and pulls to into a tall building. "What are we doing now?" I ask as he opens the doors. I recognize the inside of the building right away, the Empire State Building. We got online and he bough us tickets to go to the top. We went on an elevator what felt like hundreds of flights of stairs and we were soon at the top. Its even more cold up here then it is down there. We go to the edge of the building and look down. All the cars and people look like ants from up here. There weren't many people up here with us just about 10 other people which isn't a lot.

"The view is beautiful" I comment while looking around. "Lets ask someone to take our picture," Christian says already walking up to another man standing near us. "Sir, can you take a picture of my girlfriend and I?"

The man says yes and Christian wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me closer to him. The man takes the picture and hands Christian back his phone. "You called me your girlfriend," I smile. I see him blushing as he looks at the picture on his phone.

I know he didn't really mean girlfriend and he just didn't want to explain our status to the man but I loved the sound of being called his girlfriend. He tilted his phone toward me to show me the picture. "Its a good one," he says nodding his head in approval. "Yeah I like it," I say. "I am ganna post this," he says. "Wait, what if people think we are...dating?"

"So what? Who cares what they think? Here I will make the caption this 'Spending time in New York City with my FRIEND, Kayla'"

"People are ganna think your weird," I smile, "They already do" he said pressing "Post".

I rest my chin on the railing and look out onto the city. I hope Casey is having a good birthday, I hope Jack is treating her well. Christian rested his chin on the railing too. I just looked out but I could feel his eyes on me. I turn my head to look at his face. "What?" I ask and grin. "Nothing," he said and blushed. He kept looking at me though so I turned to look at him. Like we always do, we just looked at each other for a few minutes. It wasn't awkward or anything we just looked at each other. "We should probably get going soon, I have to be back at the hotel by 11,"

"Yeah we can take a taxi back to your hotel, I'll take you back and make sure you get back ok," we exited the building and went outside to find a taxi. When we find one the man asks what hotel I am staying in. "Hold on I forget the name," I say and check on my phone "Oh yeah, the Four Seasons," I tell the man and sit back in the seat next to Christian. "Hey that's where I am staying too,"

"Really?" I laugh. "Really," he said and rests his arm on the seat behind me. "I almost forgot! I should give you my vine name so if you loose my number, message me," I remember. "Oh yeah!" he opens his notes on his phone, "here type it in,"

I type in my user name @KaylaRiley18 and hand him back his phone. "You better not drop your phone ever again," I warn him. He laughs "I will try my hardest,"

"Christian," I say.

"Hmm" He looks up. "What if I don't see you ever again after today?"

"Don't say that," he says pushing the hair away from my face behind my ear. "I promise I wont let that happen again," he cups my hands in his and draws circles on my hand with his thumb finger. I put my head on his shoulder and he rested his head back against mine. We stayed like this for a while until the taxi came to a halt and we got out. Damn the hotel was nice! I know Casey's family makes a lot of money but this is nice.

We stand outside the hotel as the snow fell around us. "Wait before we go inside, can we just stay here for a minute," he asks not letting go of my hand. "Sure," I mentally thank him for saying that. He puts his arms around my waist and pulls me in tight His face is buried into my neck. "Jump," he whispers."Jump?" I ask, confused. "Into my arms, ready 1, 2, 3,"

I jump off the ground and he catches me in his arms like he always does. "Now put your forehead on mine," he demands. We rest our forehead against one another and our noses touch too. "I don't want to say good bye to you again," I admit. "Then don't" he responds as if the answer was obvious. There weren't many people walking by us. Our eyes were closed as we just enjoyed each others presence. "Kayla," Christian says. "Yeah," I whisper, opening my eyes. Before I could process anything his lips were clashed onto mine. He twines his fingers through my hair and pulls me in closer. "Chr-" I try to say but he keeps kissing me, "Chris-" I try again. I have to pull away finish my sentence. "I have to go,"

I jump down and walk inside. We hug one last time. "Thank you for everything, it means so much,"

"You don't have to thank me," he says, intently. "Goodbye," I kiss him on the cheek and turn around to get on the elevator. "Wait," I hear him yell and catch up to me. He spun me around and kissed me on the lips once again. "Meet me here in the lobby at 1 am." he cheekily smiles. "Okay, I will, I promise," I say, relived that I will see him again.

I get onto the elevator and go up to room 307 and pull out the key Casey's mom gave me earlier. Casey and I are sharing a room and her parents room is on the floor above us. When the elevator door shuts I can't help but smile.