Killing Is Forgiving - (Killer Croc x Reader)

5. - Contentments and Discontentments

"It does not do to dwell on
dreams and forget to live."

-J.K. Rowling-

━━━ • ✙ • ━━━

(Killer Croc's T.P.O.V.)

"Come 'ere, ratty ratty ratty!" Killer Croc slurred as he tried to snatch the two rats that tried to flee from himself. But, of course, he's more agile than them. As soon as they're trapped between his grips, he gnawed them to tiny bits.

The rats are getting blander. He hadn't eaten anything fulfilling and delicate (like humans or large pizza) these past few days. The last time (Y/n) left him a box of pizza was four days ago, or to be precise, eight days after (they) left him alone, and (they) only did that for three times until (they) suddenly stop bringing him food. (They) must've felt insecure because of what Killer Croc did to (them).

Killer Croc realizes that it's his fault since he's too reluctant to show (them) his soft spot. He doesn't want his exuding malevolence to corrupt just because of one act of kindness! He's Killer Croc after all. Besides, he did it for (Y/n)'s sake. (They)'ll be much safer with him not around. His aching heart will heal sooner or later. He's used to it anyway.

But is he really?

Funny how he thinks he's used to having his heartbroken. If he does, he shouldn't be sitting near that damned pile of trash bags, hoping for (Y/n) to magically descend down the ladder, bringing him two boxes of a large pizza.

If he does use to it, he should've resumed his mediocre yet brutal life and move along.

So no. He's not used to getting his heartbroken. He just hates to accept it, such as he hates to accept that he indeed is falling in love with (Y/n). Love, from what he learnt, is the source of catastrophes and contrition. For him, loving someone is a waste of time, especially if that someone doesn't return the feeling. He also hates that love is blinding him. It makes him create inevitable devotions which will just end up as futility.

If loving means eternal sacrifices, impending heartbreaks, and overwhelming diversion, then fuck love! He'd rather fuck with himself than submitting himself to that feeling.

Is that why people call it 'falling in love'? Because it sure feels painful when he tripped himself upon that feeling.

"... P-Please, whoever you are..."

"Yeah, Flesh; everyone has a fucking name! Why the hell did I take it personally anyway?" Killer Croc mumbled to himself, cringing at the thought when he was being sensitive towards that utterance.

His vacant stomach growled.

"Yes, I know. We're basically homeless, asshole!" He hissed towards his stomach. He's been trying to ignore that growl for a long time, but of course, starving is not an emotion. It's a situation.

"Fuck it! Human for today it is," he grumbled, rising up from his position. He began to search for an opening that will allow his body to squeeze through. After thirteen minutes of searching, he found one on the ceiling, but it wasn't fit enough for his body. He decided to expand the hole with his bare hands, and once it's gaping, he clambered and crawled himself out.

He found himself inside an abandoned building and noticed a lot of broken pots and scattered dirt, assuming that it must be a flower shop once. There's also a strong scent of wilted flowers and fertilizers. How he didn't know about this place beforehand confounds him, but at least he found this comfortable location. He could search for a mattress and spruce the room up. Besides, the door and the windows are locked and boarded up, so he doesn't have to worry about people intruding in.