Winter (A Bucky Barnes recovery story)

31 Withdrawn

It took about a month for Bucky's ankle to heal. Steve and Natasha visited him often but he finally got to a point where he just locked the door and ignored them. Steve and Nat were extremely concerned; often at night Bucky would wake up screaming, he hardly ever ate, he never spoke and he refused to leave his room.

From his three months on the street and the winter weather, he'd gotten sick but it worsened when he'd come to stark tower and stopped running. But he was stubborn and suffered in silence. Insisting he was fine even when he could hardly stand.

Desperately they tried to find other ways to restore his memory.

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Bucky was caught in another nightmare and screaming, Natasha beat on the door in an attempt to get to him. He thrashes in the bed, tangled up in the sheets. Steve helps Nat with the door and together they force it open.

Steve grabs Bucky and holds him down while Nat tries to wake him.

The whip is brought down on his back and he whimpers. He was in so much pain but knew if he screamed it would get so much worse. He falls to the ground as they kick him in the side. "Up!" The man shouts in Russian. The Winter soldier tries but can't, the scene shifts and he can't breathe. His lungs scream for air and water fills them. Hands hold him down, though he struggles. His limbs fall limp and the scene shifts again. He whimpers as someone kicks him hard in the side. He feels ribs shatter. He looks up into the face of the man. Steve kicks him again and beats him to within an inch of his life.

Bucky sits up and when he sees Steve he recoils. He stumbles into the bathroom, locks the door and vomits into the tub.

"James?" Nat says and picks the lock. She goes over and rubs his back gently. Steve stands in the doorway. Bucky vomits again, shaking. He curls up against Nat shaking, looking pale. Natasha sighs and holds him gently, running her fingers through his long tangled hair.

"Would you like to take a shower?" She asks him quietly. He nods, she turns on the water and steps into the other room so he can shower. He doesn't meet Steve's eyes as he tugs his shirt off.

Though his muscle remained he was a lot smaller, his skin was tightly stretched over his slender bones. His hands shake as he fumbles with the button on his pants, Steve sighs and shuts the door.

Bucky looks at the door sadly before removing the last of his clothes then stepping into the warm, comforting water.

He let's the warm water rinse away whatever nightmares clung to him. He relaxed under the soothing flow of water and slowly washes his hair. After what feels like forever he turns the tap off and wraps a towel around his waist. He steps out and shivers.

Natasha looks up at him, she held a tray of food. Bucky's mouth watered slightly looking at it, but ignored it along with the hollow, empty feeling in his stomach.

"We brought you some food James. You haven't eaten in a while." Natasha says quietly, gesturing to the tray. Bucky nods silently and Steve sighs.

"Thank you. Y-you can go." Bucky says softly, his voice barely audible.

"Are you sure?" Steve asks, raising an eyebrow inquisitively.

"Yes." Bucky snaps quite harshly. Steve sighs and leaves. Natasha sighs as well then follows.

He gets dressed in baggy sweat pants and a plain white shirt. Both articles were slightly bigger on him then they should've been. He sits on the bed and stares at the food.

After several minutes of debating he takes half of the sandwich and slowly, hesitantly bites into it. It tasted marvelous. The ham was so delicious mixed with the lettuce and tomatoes, mayonnaise, mustard, and Swiss cheese, together they made it one of the best meals he remembered... and one of the few meals.

He eats several more bites but then his stomach feels full and he stops; feeling sick. He lays on the bed and curls up under the sheets and comforter. He tries to sleep.

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Natasha paces anxiously. Steve sits on the couch sadly.

"He's so sick." She mumbles, finally she sits down on the couch next to him.
"We need to help him."

"How... Nat how? He doesn't want us anywhere near him. We... we should respect that." He chokes out, in his eyes you can see saying those words kill him.

"I get that Steve. I do, but we can't let him continues on like this." She replies, watching Steve nod.

"I guess." He sighs, shaking his head. "I just don't know what to do anymore."

Thank you all! Winter has reached over a thousand reads and I want to thank all of you so so much. This book has done better then I could've ever dreamed so I want to thank all of you. I'm sorry I haven't updated in forever but I've had writers block and had a hard time writing this chapter. But again thank you all so much. :)
Love, spideymanandloki