then ~ RUEL FANFIC~

Alira's POV

I sit on Coco's bed, too angry to cry. Wow. What a warm welcome back.

There's a knock on the door. I take a deep breath and pull myself together.

"Come in."

It's Kate. She looks at me and her face drops. "Oh god, what happened? What did he do? Wait, I'll call him back right now."

"No, don't... don't bother." I say. Standing up. "He just... I don't know."

"He's changed." She says quietly, leaning against the door frame. 

"So have I." I respond, avoiding eye contact.

"We all did, didn't we?"

"Yeah. I guess. I just... didn't expect it. I guess I didn't really consider what I'd find when I came back."

"No, That's fair. I think he changed the most. It's no ones fault. Some days I still come home and... it surprises me. Every time."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be, none of this... it's just life. Things happen."

"Thanks for having me, by the way."

She smiles sadly. "No worries. Any time."

There's a pause and then she asks. "What did he do?"

I shrug. "I asked him if we could... forget everything. And he kind of... i dont know, it's hard to explain, I-"

"Don't worry, it's ok. He's..."

"Yeah. Aggressive. Hates me."

Thankfully she doesn't try to argue it, but hugs me and leaves the room, Shutting the door behind her.

I look around the room at all Coco's photos stuck on the walls, jewellery hanging on hooks, the few boxes that still haven't been unpacked.

The Few possessions I brought are relatively unimportant and small. A shell Rocky gave to me. The journal dad gave me after mums death that I never opened. A necklace from Ruel that I've never worn.

The door opens suddenly and I stand up. It's Ruel.

"I... hey." He says, hand still on the doorknob.

"What's Up?"

"Nothing. I thought... we should go  looking for an apartment or unit. For you."

I smile slightly.

"Sure."

"You're not still mad?" He asks.

"Of course I'm still mad."

He grins and shoves me onto the bed.

"Let's go, stupid."

I cant help but still be mad, but I'm so glad to have him back that it's hard.

Both of us get in his car and I google home opens. 

We spend the afternoon driving round to big mansions, tiny cottages, just wandering through and the  driving to the next place. 

During the drives I catch up on everything that happened.

"After you left it was chaos. We went to Melbourne and stayed with some relatives then got evacuated from Melbourne as well because of the fires. Spend a week in tassie calling everyone we know finding out where to go. Came home first flight we could get and then spent the next few weeks just hanging around in the smoke that stayed for weeks. Helped some cleanups, realised your house survived, went back and moved there."

"What happened to everything at your old house?"

"Gone. All of it. We didn't even bother sifting through the rubble."

"I'm... I'm sorry."

"We'll start again, though. We've already started rebuilding our life."

The city flashes past outside the window. "Have you really, though?" I murmur.

He doesn't answer. 

"Ruel?" I say quietly.

"I had to let go of some things."

"No you didn't. You didn't have to. You need to choose what's right for you."

"This is right for me."

"Coco told me that-"

"I don't care what Coco told you. It didn't come from me. Next time you want to know what's going on with me, maybe ask me."

We pull into the next house and he hops out quickly. I take a moment to sigh and shake my head in anger and disbelief, remind myself I need to keep my calm.

When I walk up to the front door he's already inside.

He turns around. "I like this one."

"Oh? I mean... let me look."

I like it too, so, long story short, we buy it. Split it halves and kate and Ralph convince him to move out and live with me. 

We spend weeks moving our stuff in, shuffling and reshuffling the positions of furniture, going shopping to fill up the smallish house.

He mostly just lets me pick everything and then pays for it, which makes me feel terrible, but I know he needs to have some sense of doing something right now.

One night he's on the couch watching tv and I'm folding washing at the dining table behind him.

"I think you should get a job." I say quietly during the ad break.

"I don't."

"Why not? You need to get out, do something."

"Maybe."

"Come on, Ruel, please just look."

"There's no rush!"

"Well what're you going to do at home all day?"

"I don't know. Write songs, I guess."

I can't help but smile. "You're going to start writing again?"

"Maybe. Maybe not. I don't know."

"Are you going to go back? To everything?"

"Probably not."

I walk over and sit on the couch beside him. Curl up my legs onto the cushion and lean against his shoulder.

"I'm happy. That you're able to even consider doing this again. I know you don't want to but... think about it."

"I will. I promise." He turns the tv off and I sit up straight to face him. 

"I'm glad you came back." He says softly. "It was weird not... not having you here."

I nod and brush some hair off his face. 

It happens fast. Too fast. And yet everything seems to move in slow motion. We lean in and kiss. And it gives me hope to remember something is still there. 

It doesn't last long and when we pull apart both of us look confused.

I put my hand on his chest and smirk. "That was unexpected."

He laughs. "I knew it would happen. Eventually."

I kiss him again. Only quickly. "There. That time I was ready."

"Good. I think I'm going to go to bed now... tomorrow's Saturday so, if you want, we can go have a picnic or something. Get out of the house."

"I'd love to."

"I'll get up and do everything. I'll bring you breakfast. Don't get up. Ok?"

"Ok. Goodnight."

"Night."

Soon after he's gone I hop off the couch, switch off all the lights and go to my room.

I fall asleep smiling, for the first time in a while.