The coldest family

Alone

Denmark

I was walking next to the ocean, the waves were huge. Every time a wave hit the rocks, I would feel drops off salty water on my face. I saw other people driving cars and bicycles, they always gave me those weird looks. Well, to be honest...if I was them I would probably be shocked too after seeing a girl with shoes in her hand walking barefoot on the cliffs. My hair was tangling around my face as the wind blew on it.

I was starting to see the lights of our house. We lived far away from everyone else as long as I can remember. Everything we needed was in a town nearby. For me, it's quite big, but I know other countries say it's "small" and "boring". I can't see that.
I spent a huge part of my life there. I know every little house and shop.

I work there right now, Finn and Sweden have to travel a little further tho.
Each day, I wake up and walk for 20 minutes to my job in the "little" town. I work in a hair salon, well...I don't cut the hair. I clean and take care of the place. The owner told me he will train me this summer, and I will be able to start my journey as a hairstylist!

I saw the lights of my home getting stronger. I started walking towards the street. It wasn't really crowded so I quickly ran through it to the other side.
I put on my shoes and tied my hair with a red ribbon so I can look cleaner. I started walking towards the door when I noticed something.
Finland's car was gone...at that moment I didn't think about it much. He was probably on a date with Estonia again.
I like Estonia, he is so nice and caring. Just what Finland needed.

I reached for the handle and opened the door. I stumbled into the house while looking around. It was oddly quiet. I mean...it was always quiet here but the little things were gone. I couldn't hear Iceland practicing his guitar upstairs. The sound of Sweden making coffee for him and Norway was nowhere to be found and the buzzing of Finland's gaming set was gone.

I tensed up. I took off my shoes and my coat. I started walking towards the kitchen, it was the only place that was light up in the entire house. I stopped in the doorway and my smile dropped. Sweden was sitting at the kitchen island crying and Norway was holding his hand whispering something.
A flashback appeared in front of me for a few seconds.

-I can't do it Norway it's too much!

I was nine, Sweden was whining and Norway was holding him tight to her body with tears in her eyes.

-We can't lose them Sweden! You have to stay strong...do it for them.

I felt tears going down my cheeks.

-B...broter, why are you crying...?

Sweden turned his face to me it was all red, he was 27 again. Norway was staring at my, she clearly felt uncomfortable.
She whispered something to Sweden but he shook his head.

-Let her stay. She isn't a kid anymore. I'll talk to her alright?

Norway looked a bit confused but she nodded and got out of the kitchen, giving me a pat on the back in the doorway.
Sweden sighed and looked at me, he was so tired...his eyes were red and puffy.

-Come here...

I walked towards him and sat on a chair next to him. He looked at the ground for a minute or two. I think he wasn't sure if he should tell me or not. He finally looked back at me and I'll never forget what he said.

-Finland told him about the fight...

I felt like if I was about to drop to the ground. Was this some sort of a crazy dream?
I remembered when Finland told me.

It was a sunny spring afternoon and we were playing badminton in our backyard. He suddenly stopped and sat on the ground. He patted the grass next to him. I sat there and he started talking

-Denmark...do you know how, there is a bad opinion about us in our school...?

I felt my heart stop. Surely I knew. I was literally getting bullied every day because of it.

-Yes...where are you going with this...?

I started sweating, I was getting so scared and stressed up. I hated that topic.

-It's because of the fight I had with Norway.

My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. I knew they used to hate each other but...I never knew to what point.

-G...go on...

-We were in the hallway, as always I was mad at her for something. Our lockers were next to each other so I used it and slammed her locker right in front of her as she was taking out her books...to scare her. One thing went to another and as always we were screaming at eachother...then...I said something.

I saw him gulping, he started shaking.

-..."it's your fault mom and dad died, I wish it was you not them. Maybe you fucking killed them, you quiet weirdo!"

A shiver went through my body.

-Everyone stopped. My sister, people around us. I realized what I said and covered my mouth. Nobody knew we were orphans except for the teachers. Norway ran away crying and I just stood there. From that day on the rumors started. She was a loner before but now they started picking at her even more.
"murderer"..."miss trauma"..."psycho"...she had enough shit to deal with before and now...it got even worse.
People started talking...in no time everyone hated her, and afterward anyone who came after her from our family...

He started crying.

-I'm sorry Denmark...I was such an idiot...

It was the worst month of my life. Everyone was stressed and at the same time we had to pretend like it's nothing for little Iceland.
I was so furious. I remember how much I cried and Finland left the house for whole 3 weeks.

Sweden started crying again, he looked so hopeless.

-N...no, you are kidding right? We agreed to never tell him. He wasn't suppose to go through that shit!

I was getting angry again. Sweden didn't even care I swore. He was a mess...

-I'm s...sca...scared Denmark...

I felt like I was being punched by those words. Sweden was always so strong it was hard to see him weak and in tears.

-Sweden...

I hugged him and started leaning back and forth. He was shivering and his face was all wet from the crying.
I thought about something. It was dumb but it might work.

-Blåsippan ute i backarna står, niger och säger att "nu är det vår". Barnen de plockar små sipporna glatt, rusar sen hem under rop och skratt.

Mor, nu är våren kommen, mor! Nu får vi gå utan strumpor och skor! Blåsippan ute i backarna stå, har varken skor eller strumpor på... *

I felt him calm down as I sang to him. His breath was slowing down and he wasn't so tensed up anymore.
He used to sing it to me always when I cried.

-It will be okay Swden...we will pull through it. We always do.

He squeezed my hand tight and nodded slightly.

* this is a swedish children song called "Blåsippor". Here is the translation:

The blue anemone blooms now,
Curtsies and says "spring is here".
Children merrily pick the flowers,
And rush home, laughing.

Mom! Spring has come now, mom!
Now we can go without socks and shoes!
The blue anemone outside
Wears neither sock nor shoe!