CMOL and Fearless

16

I arrived at the building where the ceo was staying. It hadn't been that long since I had been here, about 27 minutes. I was scared and I didn't know what to expect. We belong to him. I knew that sentence was wrong. We didn't belong to anyone. We were our own person. But every time I heard that sentence, I didn't even complain. I mean, here I was heading into a building knowing that I was walking right up to someone who would gladly beat me up. It's like I was telling him «It's okay, I deserve it, beat me up!». It was wrong! Yet did I really have a choice? No. No, I didn't.

I entered the room the ceo was in. He was siting at a desk on his MacBook. I resisted the urge to vomit and pushed unwanted memories away. This man had no right to do what he was doing to us. But he was getting away with it. It's been two years already that he's been acting like this. I longed for it to be like 3 years ago. Being an idol, but not like this. We laughed more, talked more, smiled more.

"I'm here." I announced my presence.

The ceo turned.

"I thought you knew, being with a girl or a boy is not allowed. No dating in general."

"I'm not dating anyone."

"You can lie however many times you want, I won't believe you."

"Get on your knees." He added.

Without any hesitation I got on my knees. Wow, I had really become obedient. This was wrong. I should get up. But what if my brother gets hurt? Stay down then. I closed my eyes.

I felt a boot connect to my side. I screamed. The ceo continued to attack me. I cannot talk to Mi Kyung again. I won't. The ceo will somehow find out if I do. He always seems to find everything out.

An hour later...

I stumbled into the place my group and I were staying. My chest hurt. He bruised some of my ribs and I could already imagine the purple splotches that would soon cover my chest and stomach.

"Guys! Guys help." I cried stumbling into the living room.

Zeke rushed over to help me onto the couch.

Then I saw her. Mi Kyung. She was siting in one of the chairs with a mug of hot chocolate but she set down her hot chocolate when I entered the room.

"I'm seeing things, right?" I exclaimed.

Siwoo looked at where Mi Kyung was siting.

"No, you're not seeing things. Mi Kyung is here. I called her and gave her our address. She decided to stop by because she was worried about you. She said you sounded sick on the phone. She's been in California for a week now with her friend."

"What happened to you?!" Mi Kyung asked worriedly.

"I ran into some anti fans." I lied.

"They did this to you?"

"Y'a." I replied.

Thank God. Mi Kyung seemed to buy my lie. Thankfully the members must not of told her anything.

"I guess this is another reason we can't be together, I don't want you to get hurt." I said quietly.

After talking for a few minutes, Mi Kyung left. Zeke helped me put bandages on my new bruises.

"Why would you tell her our address? And why did you call her? How did you even know her number?" I asked.

"Wow, calm down there. You haven't been healthy lately and I've been worried. I thought if she came over, when you got back you'd be happy that she's here." Siwoo explained.

"I can't talk to her anymore. The ceo seems to think we are dating or something. I barely even know her and even though she's a very nice person, I'm not going to risk my brother's life and my future because of some crush!"

"Okay, that was a bad decision but what are you going to do about your health? Are you going to stop overworking yourself?"

"My health? Siwoo we're all pretty unhealthy in my opinion. What, you think I'm that much worse then you guys? How could you be, you are in constant stress and worry just like me, and the beatings, I can't forget to mention that. My point is, none of us are healthy!" I exclaimed.

I started crying.

"I know. I know you are worried about me. And I'm worried about you guys too. Leroy, you barely eat. Yes, the ceo is strict about your diet but honestly, who cares what he thinks. Siwoo, don't think we don't notice you shaking and your silent crying every time we drive to the ceo's place.

Zeke, I hear you quietly mumbling words like "It will be okay soon, someone will save us". You are desperately trying to make sure we are alright but you need to take care of yourself too.

Junsu, you're only seventeen years old. You're clearly terrified just like us all, but you still try to stay happy. You use excuses like, "I'm going to make dinner" to get yourself out of talks with us every time we ask you how you're doing.

And Owen, I can tell you're scared. You're having a hard time too. You and Leroy, I know you guys want to be together but you're so scared that the ceo will find out."

"We're all hurting" I finished.

The other members started crying too at that point and we all were quiet for a while.

"What really will happen after our contract expires?"

"He probably won't let it expire." I said.

"Then what happens when we get older and are too old to be kpop idols?"

"That's the question."

"Will he kill us?"

"Not all at the same time, that would draw too much suspicion. The threat upon our families will probably stay until we are all killed one by one. He wouldn't want to live in fear of us telling someone." I explained.

"Zeul!"

"Okay, sorry. The other option is he keeps the threat on our families forever and we live on. We will continue seeing posts online of how the widely known and loved ceo Paek is living as a retired healthy old man with enough money to satisfy him until he dies of old age. Is that what you want? For him to never ever be held accountable for his sins? Are you all going to come out and tell everyone about what he's done to us after he's dead?" I said.

"Will they even believe us? Where's the proof? We'd be trying to ruin the reputation of a well loved man." I added quietly.

We sat in silence until Junsu got up to make dinner.

Hello everyone. How are you doing. I hope you aren't all too lonely! Stay healthy!