CMOL and Fearless

38

I was missing my brother a lot lately. I hadn't seen him in ages and even when I did see him, it was either only for short amounts of time or I would leave and go places often while visiting him. I was worried if I stayed for too long, I would tell him everything. That couldn't happen.

Siwoo and Leroy both mentioned how they were missing their families too and I was sure the other members were missing their families as well, they just hadn't said anything.

Our maknae started trying to connect more with our fans, talking to them on live or texting them. We were allowed to talk to our fans so it helped us feel less lonely.

Even though we had each other, we all were tired and sometimes got into arguments, so we would talk to our fans to feel less lonely.

These days, I spoke with Dae Seong from JOIN. We had become great friends over the months and he was a cool person to talk to.

I had learned that, no his orange hair didn't glow, but I still didn't fully believe that. It looked like it really could be glow in the dark. He now had brown hair. I was a little sad about that, I thought his orange hair was really cool.

"Zeul!"

"Okay!"

I got up off the couch and quickly headed into the kitchen.

"The deal was, if you skip practice, you need to help decorate our apartment for our maknae's birthday!"

I grabbed the box of party streamers and some tape and started decorating the kitchen and living room.

It was just Siwoo and I and the birthday boy and the other members were in the practice room. We had about an hour to decorate the apartment and put icing on the cake.

"It's August 25th already! I can't believe it!" I exclaimed.

"Time sure goes by fast."

"At times, yes. Other times it feels like a very minute would never end." I stated.

"Zeul, let's stay positive." Siwoo said.

I nodded.

"Yeah, Sorry."

Half an hour later, I got down from a chair I was standing on after taping the last the party streamers to the wall.

"He's turning 18 years old today."

Siwoo nodded.

"Do you think... he wouldn't right?..... I'm worried about our maknae."

I started crying.

"I'm scared, I'm scared for Junsu, I'm so, so scared. Siwoo, if the ceo decides he's old enough... I don't think I'd be able to let him touch Junsu, I rather volunteer myself a thousand times."

Siwoo gave me a hug.

"I know, your our big brother. I know. "

I sniffled.

"I'm sorry I didn't protect you from him the first time it happened to you."

"It's okay, I don't blame you. It's me who should be apologizing to you. I should of just dealt with it, I shouldn't of given you a reason to step in that time... it's my fault he hurt you like that."

"No it isn't your fault. It was my decision, I decided to make him angry."

"I guess we shouldn't really be blaming ourselves, it's the ceo who is in the wrong." Siwoo stated.

I nodded.

"How is the cake?"

"I've finished decorating it."

The younger boy showed me the cake he had decorated. It was a homemade chocolate cake with vanilla icing and the words «happy birthday!» were perfectly written in chocolate icing.

"It's beautiful, great job."

"Thanks." The boy smiled.

I headed to the practice room after dinner. I had given the birthday boy his gift before I left. Siwoo was going to join me in a bit.