Timore NICO DI ANGELO X OC (male)

18

TW- check information of story to see specifics

Mika absolutely refused sleep after this, Nico heard him at night get up and lock himself in the bathroom, or drawing things in a sketchbook. He wanted him to be sleeping but he knew forcing him would make things worse so he decided to just let him wear out a bit so he had to sleep, he didn't have any other choices. Leo was great at keeping his and Mika's spirits up though. He thankfully was able to get Mika to eat more and all three meals a day, which was a huge improvement to five grapes a few weeks ago.

"Nico! Why is it blue? It's apple flavored!" Mika almost spit out what he thought was going to be blueberry flavored. Nico looked confused.

"I didn't pick out a drink yet? Were you thinking of blue apples?"

"No..."

"Where's my juice?!" Percy stood up for tables away and overturned it on Jason's head, nothing coming out. Leo started cracking up.

"Mika! You have Percy's juice! Go return it to him he looks like a toddler crying over snack time or something." He was almost rolling off his bench laughing. Mika looked at Nico, who nodded and gestured towards Percy. He stood up and walked as quick as possible over to his table.

"I-I think your cup was w-weird. I got your juice." He set it on the table and turned to walk away.

"Hey don't walk away! Thanks man!" Percy held up a hand for a high five, Mika uncomfortably returning it before rushing back and sitting down with the others.

"Good job Mika!" Nico gave a thumbs up.

They decided to go on a walk through the woods after lunch, Leo mentioning some great climbing trees he found. After several hours of climbing around and surprise gifts of laughter from Mika, they had dinner and started to head back to the Hades cabin. Mika looked behind his shoulder and hesitated.

"I-I kinda want to try the campfire tonight. If, that's okay." Nico's face lit up and he nodded.

"Yeah let's go!" They sat down in between Percy and Annabeth and Jason. Tonight everyone was just chatting and hanging out, no singing happening. Mika just sat, and stared at the ground, Jason attempting to strike up conversation a few times. After a while people started to disperse and the two got up to leave. As they were waking someone walked past Nico, close enough to speak quiet enough others couldn't hear.

"Not going to lie, really thought your friend here was a skeleton warrior." They walked away before Nico could respond or see who it was. Mika kept his face down but it was clear he had heard.

They got back and after he threw on more comfortable clothes, Mika grabbed his sketchbook and started drawing or writing something, making sure Nico could see.

The son of Hades watched for a while, before letting himself drift off, leaving Mika to his thoughts.

Mika POV.

  Nico seemed really uneasy after that person passed us. I only caught something about me being a skeleton. Can't help it when i can barely keep a sandwich down. He shook his head, putting the sketch book down. A horrible yet perfectly depicted picture of Tartarus could be seen. He stared at it, images and memories flooding out. He took a shaky breath and quietly as possible went and locked himself in the bathroom. He had found out after a few experiments that this room was soundproof so no one outside could hear what was inside. He sat on the bathtubs edge, turning the water on low.

He took a piece of broken glass out of his toiletries bag that he had found in Nico's clearing and stared at it for a while. He didn't even process what he was doing until he was looking intently at the blood streaming down his arm, washing away after it fell into the tub. He sat back and closed his eyes, not daring to try and sleep.

This wasn't living. Everyone had been so shocked when he came back. "Oh the Thanatos kid is alive!" "Oh my gods he survived Tartarus!" But this wasn't life. He was trapped in his head, he couldn't take two steps without being reminded of that horrible place. He couldn't enjoy anything, he couldn't sleep, he couldn't laugh without forcing it. Nico and Leo were obviously happy to be around him, but for how long? He's just another 'skeleton' walking around with them, nodding when they talk. He wasn't a bad person, but he hadn't done anything heroic ever. So, if the underworld for him would be countless days of drifting, gray, and forgetting, why wasn't he there already? To him, that seems more like life than the suffering being 'alive' had brought him. So what was stopping him from living?

Tears streamed down him face as he thought. He made his decision, he wasn't even going to leave anything. Nico could find him if he wanted bad enough, Mika wouldn't remember anything anyways. He looked down, the blood flowing down his arm. He picked up the glass and did it without thinking, into the thin skin of his wrist. He blinked, and it was dark.

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"Why did you think that would work?" Mika sat up and looked around. He looked down quickly. He wasn't bleeding anymore, just scars were in the place. He put his head up and met eyes with a tall, dark haired man in a pin striped suit. Hades. He scrambles to his feet and gave a small awkward bow. He was shaking all over, barely able to breathe.

"S-sorry sir. D-did I think what w-would?" Hades just cocked an eye brow and looked down at Mika's arm and back up.

"You know exactly what I mean." He strolled up a few steps and sat down on an intricate throne. "Your father, if you have forgotten, knows when this happens. And by what I mean happens, I mean death. He chose to come deliver you here. But, not to become just another one of the dead, it isn't your time yet, and he knew that, because he will come back when it is. However, the way you chose to go suggest certain things..." He looked at Mika, gesturing for him to start talking.

"I-I, can't live anymore. Your a god, can't you just let it happen? Let me just become a ghost of who I am, and forget? I'm tired of the effort of trying to get better when I know I never will." He put his head down, shocked at himself for talking back that much in front of a god.

"Well, I know you'll listen to me more than anyone else. Go, I am not a merciful being, but I am being kind in this circumstance. You'll understand soon, but in no situation would letting yourself go benefit anyone, not even yourself. My son, Nico, has been working day in and day out to help you am I correct?" Mika nodded, smiling slightly. "If you talk, he will listen. You can scream, cry, yell. He went through what you did, he understands, he has someone who understand as well now. You are both a gift to each other, now accept it, and learn how to live."

Mika just nodded, he started feeling terrified at the fact that he could have been dead. He hung his head, nodding. He blinked and opened his eyes to absolute nothingness, and then again, to the tub he was now sitting inside. He took a shaky breath, looking down at his arm. The scars were definitely there, the cuts somehow completely healed up. He sat for what felt like hours, and eventually decided that he had to at least try. He got up and put the bathroom back in order and walked out to his bed. It was around 4am, he laid down as his tears started spilling out, he turned over to try and muffle himself, hugging his pillow the rest of the night, the full weight of what he had just done and experienced crashing down on him.