Black Dagger Brotherhood Fan Fiction

Chapter Twelve

Lassiter and I are in my room and I can't help the smile that sprea on my face. It feels so great to be back. I grab his arm before he disappears on me, "Talk!" "Hi, I'm Lassiter. I love long walks on the beach and watching The Golden Girls-" "Stop! Just tell me what's wrong," I say sharply. He holds onto both my shoulders and looks me in the eye, "I can't tell you everything that goes on. I have my purpose and I have my job to do. You just need to trust me." His wings spread out and he starts glowing softly. I feel warmth radiating from my chest and the tension in my shoulders release. "I do trust you. I just want to help if I can." He shakes his head and goes back to his usual self, "This is how it should be." He walks away and reaches for my room door. He pauses with his hand on the doorknob and says softly, "I'm so sorry." Then he leaves. I go and knock on Luchas's door. Everything seems quiet in there so I knock again but there's still no reply. I go to the billiards room but it's empty. Now that's unusual. The kitchen is my next stop and I see Z preparing a tray of food. He looks up in surprise, "Where the hell have you been?" I look back bewildered as I hop on a stool, "Lassiter needed some help with something. He said that he told everyone here that I was safe." He frowns, "Yeah but we expected you back earlier than this. It's good to see you though." "Thanks," I smile, "How long have I been gone? And where is everyone?" He starts layering his sandwiches, "It's been close to two weeks. Everyone is recuperating. There were multiple raids happening all at once and we had to go out there. It happened over a few nights so everyone is exhausted." "That's horrible!" I grimace, "Is everyone okay?" He nods, "There were a few civilians that didn't make it but all of us are okay." He has a plaster over his nose, I can make out some stitches at the edge. There's a bandage over his forearm as well. "So, what about tonight? Do you guys have fighters to go out?" I ask. "It's midday now so Wrath said we have to see him to discuss things after first meal." I cup my chin thoughtfully, "You know, I've been taking kung fu lessons for a while now. Maybe I could fight too." He freezes and looks at me, his eyes turn black and I notice the temperature in the room drop, "No." He doesn't shout but that's that. "Besides, I would have thought you wouldn't want to get anywhere near any one of those bastards again." I fold my arms across my chest, "You think I've been training all this time to stay home? I need to get payback. I haven't spoken to Wrath about it yet, but when I feel like I'm ready, I will." He looks at me sternly but doesn't say anything and goes back to his tray. "Don't be disappointed when Wrath doesn't entertain the idea," he says as he pushes a plate with a sandwich towards me and takes his tray. He strides off before I can say anything else. After finishing my sandwich, I go to the pool to look for Luchas but he isn't there either. I pass a few doggen cleaning up as I head to my room. I check for Luchas again but he's either asleep or not there. I go to my room and flop on the bed. So about two weeks. That's how long I was there. No wonder I felt like I was going to lose it. Lassiter's apology keeps running through my mind. What on earth is he apologizing for. It's not like he had anything to do with whatever has happened to me. If anything, he's one of the main reasons I feel more like myself after everything. I'm sure he must have been helping out with the raids. But why keep me away from here? If Wrath had said no to me fighting, I would have listened. He may not be my King but he always makes decisions that's best for those involved. All my thoughts run across each other and I shut my eyes and control my breathing to try and shut it off. I sometimes have trouble breathing so Mary gave me some exercises to help with that and to prevent anxiety attacks. I had a few of those when I first woke up. I haven't had any trouble with it recently though. Just shortness of breath every now and then. The breathing exercises lull me to sleep. I wake up with a wracking cough and run to the toilet. It feels like I might throw up. I cough into the toilet and spit out the gunk at the back of my throat. It's blood. As I push against the floor to wake up, my palm slips on something. I look down to find a congealed silver substance on my hand. What the hell is this. "Shea! Are you okay?" I jerk and look up to see Lassiter bending over me. "Just a coughing fit. It's nothing," I say in a hoarse voice. He looks at me sternly as he wipes the corner of my mouth with his thumb, "So that's why it looks like you had a fight with the toilet. FYI, looks like the toilet is winning." He shows me the blood on his thumb. "What's this?" I ask as I show him my hand with the silver stuff on it. "Nothing," he says quickly as he grabs my hand and pulls me to the basin to wash it off. "Oh no, please don't tell me!" I look at him in disgust. "What?" he asks distractedly and then sees my expression, "Oh God no! Why would you even think that!" "I don't know," I say annoyed and embarrassed, "You said you used my room." I go for the tap and start washing my hands so I don't have to look at him. He snorts and covers his mouth as his shoulders shake. I feel my face heat up even more. "I'm glad I amuse you," I snap, "You didn't answer me, by the way. What is it?" I turn around to glare at him. He rolls his eyes, "It is from my body but it's just blood." "Just blood," I say in a low voice. "Don't give me that look," he says growing serious. "I'm all fixed up. You on other hand-" "-I feel fine, really. It was just because I was coughing so hard." I hear footsteps in my bedroom, "Shea?" Blay comes in and notices me, a big smile lights up his face and he grabs me in a bear hug. "I've missed you! Why were you gone for so-" he pauses and looks at me in concern, "You're bleeding!" He holds me at arms length to look at me and I notice that Lassiter is nowhere to be seen. "It's okay, Blay," I smile to try and comfort him. He looks at me aghast, "There is blood in your teeth, Shea!" 

That's how we ended up in the medical facility. Blay insisted on calling Jane even though she was probably asleep. She ran some tests while Blay and Q waited outside. I join them once she's done. "How are you feeling?" asks Q. "I keep saying I feel fine," I say, exasperated. Blay clicks his tongue at me in annoyance. I roll my eyes at him, "Don't. I did come down for the tests after all." He flicks my ear, "Yes after all the moaning and groaning." "Where's Luchas?" I ask. "I went to his room but he didn't answer." Q rubs the back of his head, "He changed rooms while you were gone." I feel my face fall but I look straight ahead and keep walking, "Why?" Q shrugs, "You're going to have to ask him."

 It's been a few days since then. Jane asked me to come in to do a few more tests and some scans but said they're still waiting on results before she can say anything. Doesn't that sound promising. I've asked Blay and Q to keep it to themselves. I don't need everyone knowing I've been to see Jane. Luchas has been steadily avoiding me. I haven't been able to find him at the pool. Apparently he was starting to get out a little more. Going to the billiards room or watching movies in the entertainment room. I haven't managed to see him there either when I've checked. My phone rings and I answer quickly when I see Jane's name pop up. She asks me to come down to the clinic. Blay and Q told me that they wanted to know what's happening when I know. They wanted to come with me actually but I feel like this is something I should do alone. I knock on Jane's office door and she calls me in. "Why don't you take a seat?" she says. I frown as I sit down, "How bad is it?" Jane pinches the bridge of her nose and takes a deep breath. She looks up at me and I notice how absolutely exhausted she looks. Having everyone rely on her day after day must be so difficult. "I've done all the tests I could and I've done them twice. Manny has checked with me and we've asked a few others for their opinion as well. But the diagnosis is always the same." I sit at the edge of my seat. This can't be good. "Shea, you have lung cancer."