Darkness.
The quiet noise of the cars rolling by.
In a world full of people but-
alone.
Under three or four blankets but-
cold.
Sleep supposedly turns off your mind but-
mine's racing.
That's when the dreams hit.
Fragments of my past, my memories, sometimes even future.
Float around my head.
Mixing- with the memories.
Shouting the things I want to forget.
Tears roll down my face, unconscious, but somehow still- awake.
I take all the hits that seem to just keep coming.
I'm aware to my brokenness, I don't these reminders to keep me awake.
The room is silent, no sound, nothing.
But my head keeps spinning.
My thoughts keep winning.
Will I ever get out?
Will I ever get out?
This is when life and death seem no different.
My mind turns into hell.
Did I ask for this?
I try to think over the cocophony of my insecurities.
This is when I think about how empty I feel.
The deep black void in my soul expands.
My heart shatters more than it already has.
I'm lost in a sea of thoughts.
I carelessly let my mind wander.
I have no strength left to restrain myself.
I think of things that might make me happy.
I think of things that might fill me with light.
But they don't, they leave me more empty than before.
I end up wanting things I can't have more and more.
I wake up my mind numb and sore.
I have to face the day alone, a war.
The sun is out, it's warm and bright yet-
I am cold and dull.
My mind can't open my eyes to see the world.
I walk through the day.
Oblivious to the choices I make.
My demons have my soul.
I fear I'm lost.
To my mind.
To my dreams.
YOU ARE READING
The Messed Up Mind Of Me
De Todolife throws a lot of challenges at us. some of us can take the hits. we get back up again after we fall. but even the strongest souls can be lost in this world. and even the weakest souls can become strong. people, faces, words. words are weapons. h...
