Meet Me

Chapter 31 - The First Time

2011

Kate

"I wanna look into your eyes til' they roll back." - Dappy - Explode

He was barely a stranger. I knew Kyle. It wasn’t as if I were giving my virginity to a complete stranger. Okay, I lied. I barely knew anything about Kyle. I knew that he did one nighter’s for money. He was fourteen, but I didn’t judge him for what he chose to do. He was a misfit child. He had told me that. It wasn’t a heartfelt conversation, but it was as close as we would ever get to having one.

He told me he had a limit – an age limit. That didn’t make it anymore okay. His age limit was fourteen to eighteen. He told me he did this because he had no choice. I started to think he was a runaway, but perhaps not? Anyway, he did one night, no relationship required and a payment over ten pounds. I wasn’t any different. I wanted to be. I wasn’t. The only difference was that I hadn’t asked for this, I wasn’t paying. I had known him for almost a whole year now. We had never engaged in a relationship, but that wasn’t what either of us were looking for.

Kyle was good-looking, of course. We had many things in common. I was worrying too much; I was trying to keep something else on my mind. I told myself over and over again that this meant nothing to him; it shouldn’t mean anything to me. Of course, it did.

 I hadn’t exactly dressed up for the occasion, more like dressed down. I was wearing something that should be illegal for a girl my age to wear. I was also about to do something illegal. I had robbed, pick pocketed, vandalised and gotten drunk and high on drugs before. All of those things, I had done them with Kyle. It only seemed right I did this illegal thing with Kyle too.

I didn’t have much experience with sex, but I had read one or two books with it in. Also, I paid attention in the sex education lessons. I knew about contraception – I hoped Kyle had some – and about pregnancy. I didn’t want to get pregnant at all. If I did, I would just have an abortion – I wasn’t against them at all. I was far too young to be having a baby. I may turn into a slut, but I didn’t want to turn into a teen mum. I know that there are some amazing teen mothers out there, but along with the good there are always the bad. There is absolutely no denying that.

First, he took me to a hotel. It was a shitty hotel, but then again that didn’t matter. He paid for a room. With cash. He told the receptionist, when she asked, that I was his sister. She didn’t look like she believed us, but what was the point in her believing us?

“Thank you.” Kyle said when she gave him the room key.

“Room three-four-two. Floor three. Top floor.” She explained.

We left immediately. We headed for the lift, however it was out of use. Of course it was, this was one of those shitty hotels.

Climbing the stairs, we were silent.

“Come on, Kate. Losing air?” Kyle teased.

I shook my head.

“I am a lot fitter than you are.” I teased back.

“I know.” Now that made me scoff.

“That the best you got?” I threw back.

Kyle shook his head and waited for me to catch up to him before he took my waist and pulled me closer. His lips touched mine. They were so warm that I didn’t want to stop kissing him. My arms hooked round his neck loosely. By my waist, he pulled me closer to him. He led us up the stairs, him walking backwards, pulling me ever closer. If this were a movie, there would be Florence and the machine playing in the background. This wasn’t a movie, this was real life. I needed to get a grip on it.

We finally found our room. Without opening his eyes, or parting his lips from mine, Kyle unlocked the door to the room. We clumsily stumbled inside and shut the door behind us, dropping the key somewhere on the floor.

We undressed, we kissed and I lost my virginity to him.

I lay next to him afterwards. The bed was uncomfortable, but Kyle’s body was. I had never been this intimate with the opposite sex before, so this was a whole new adventure for me. I liked the way it felt though. If I could, I would do this all the time. I realized I could. I could even get paid for it. No, that was prostitution. I wouldn’t swoop to that level.

“What are you thinking about?” Kyle asked, tucking my hair behind my ear. He began to leave a trail of kisses down my chest and stomach.

“I didn’t do this so I could have a heartfelt conversation with you, Kyle.” I told him.

“Stay with me, just for tonight.”

“You’re breaking your own rules.”

“Rules are there to be broken, don’t you agree?” I couldn’t possibly say no, not after everything I had done.

“Sometimes.” I admitted

“This is one of those sometimes.” He replied after a second of silence.

“That doesn’t make sense.” I said, frowning.

“Neither do you.”

“Should I?”

“No. I like you just the way you are.”

We lay together in a tangled hug, not speaking. This went on for half an hour before I looked up at Kyle. He was asleep.

“Goodnight, Kyle.” I untangled my body from his and gathered my clothes together. I dressed, then I left. I sneaked downstairs. The same receptionist sat behind the desk, a cup of steaming coffee lingering at her lips. It almost made me laugh.

“Sister, eh?” She asked

“Yeah, that was my brother.” I lied.