Addicted

Dream On

Blackness.

Numbness.

Did it happen?

She thought quietly, the sentence echoing through her head. It didn't seem like it. The nothingness in her head was intoxicating, with just a prickle of reality. Her thoughts became more and more aware. She realized then that she must still alive, just unconscious.

Mumbling.

Flashes of colour.

What was that?

Amber light slowly leaked into frame. A room made of complete steel. That familiar thrumming of engines. The Prydwen. But this felt different. The mumbling slowly and surely became more understandable as the amber light grew. Moving from a blur to something more coherent, a room. The Command Deck. There were 7 people in the room. 6 of them were senior level workers aboard The Prydwen that Lila recognized very vaguely. The seventh person was the one speaking; Arthur.

"Brothers and Sisters, the road behind us has been long and fraught with difficulty. Each and every one of you has surpassed my expectations by rapidly facilitating our arrival in the Commonwealth."

Hang on...this felt like a déjà-vu, even though it was happening in her mind and not around her.

"You have accomplished this amazing feat without a hint of purpose or direction, and most impressively, without question."

She had heard this before she had sworn, as she heard the voice prattle on about revealing their true mission in the Commonwealth.

"Beneath the Commonwealth there is a cancer...known as the Institute, a malignant growth that needs to be cut before it infects the surface."

It dawned on her then where she had heard this speech before, and the hatred that tinted Arthur's voice as he spoke. She was reliving the first time she had met Arthur. Though she wasn't living it through her own eyes, she was viewing it as if she were a fly on the wall

As if on cue, out of the back of the room came a woman. Herself. She couldn't not look at her past self. She could feel confidence radiating off of her, but also a deeply buried grief and sadness. There was also a hint of nervousness as she watched herself watch the man at the front of the room. Her body was also much different. Not ravaged by Chems and still held some of the weight she had carried from her Pre-War life. Voluminous, is what she used to consider it. She knew her body now was just a silhouette of what it used to be. By the time her attention fell back to the Elder he was almost done of his speech.

"This campaign will be costly and many lives will be lost. But in the end, we will be saving humankind from it's worse enemy...itself. Ad Victoriam!"

As he spoke the last two wards he gave the customary, cross body salute as all those present responded and left the room; except for Lila. She watched herself move forward slightly, toward Arthur.

"I care about them, you know. The people of the Commonwealth."

From where she watched the scene she watched his shoulder deflate slightly as he spoke.

"If you say so."

She watched as her body shifted, her arms coming across her chest. Lila had to admit, in her first moments in front of him and knowing what she had from rumours around the Commonwealth, she didn't believe him when he said that. The Brotherhood she had come to know from others seemed to just be there to make war. After getting closer to him she realized that, in his own way, he did care.

"I can understand your indecisiveness. Turning your weapons on the very same people that you're trying to save can be a bitter pill to swallow."

If she was in her own body she would have flinched at that statement. Having to pull the trigger on her own son had solidified that in her mind.

"So, what do you want from me?"

"I want you to start taking responsibility for this planet. To start making a difference."

Another flinch, if it were possible. She felt like she had taken much more responsibility than was needed. Not only did she feel responsible for the actions of the past, but also the actions of many of the things happening then and things that  continued to happen. Lila had made a difference alright, but not the way she had imagined. She logged her mind back into the conversation at hand.

"Therefore, from this moment forward, I'm granting you the rank of knight. And, befitting your new title, we're granting you a suit of Power Armour to protect you on the field of battle. Wear it with pride."

"Knight? What is this? The Dark Ages?"

The sarcasm was dripping from her voice and she watched the small upturn of her lips on the right side of her face. Arthur's facade cracked for a millisecond, the tiniest of flickers happened behind his blue eyes. That had been the first thing she had noticed about him: those piercing, scalding, bright steely blue eyes.

"Judging from the state of the world, it wouldn't be a stretch to say we're living in that era again."

He went on to tell her to get familiar with the ships and it's occupants before reporting for some new orders. She clumsily gave the Brotherhood salute and a nod.

"Thank you, Elder. I won't let you down."

"Oh, I have a feeling you won't..."

His voice trailed off softly and she watched a quick blush radiate from behind the collar of her Vault suit before she scurried off. Arthur leaned forward on the railing of the command deck, looking outwards at the Commonwealth. From there things started to fade, waver, before slowly falling away. Lila tried to grab at something solid in her mind but couldn't.

Her eyes fluttered open slowly. She looked around carefully, noticing the darkness of the room. It was night again, so she had been out for almost a day. And this was real, not another dream. Her eyes then fell to the man sleeping with his head placed gently on his folded arms.

Arthur. He looked so at peace while he slept, his face actually relaxed instead of pinched in annoyance or the usual cold, emotionless, tough exterior he provided to majority of those he met. Lila then remembered how young the Elder actually was; just a mere 21. His time in battle and as Elder hadn't been kind to him. The scar down the right side of his face didn't take away from his appearance, just adding another air of mystery to those who only knew him at a distance.

Lila began to trace gentle circles on the arm of his flight suit, glad to see she wasn't dreaming again he really was there. His eyes snapped open and he lifted his head slowly, looking back at her. Another comfort: those eyes never changed.