ＤＮＹＬ || ＮＪＭ

19

PANIC ATTACK
KY

I still haven't told my parents Jinyoung's back. I can't. They'll not let me out of the house, let alone go to school.

I rushed from the subway station as fast as I could to the school, and ended up being thirty minutes late.

I glanced at my watch, only three minutes till the first period is over. So, I just walked in the hallways.

"Hey" I heard someone whisper, I looked up to see Doyoung.

"Hey Doyoung" I smiled at him as I spoke in a low volume. He crouched down and sat next to me, against the wall.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him, he shrugged.

"I don't like Ms. Kang like- she hates me"

I laughed, "and i was late. Mrs. Kim would've killed me if she saw that I was late to her class"

"So" He asked, I turned to look at him, "How are you?"

"Better than before. I guess I was shocked yesterday" i replied, he nodded.

Just then, the bell rang. I saw Mrs. Kim walk out of my class to the opposite direction. Me and Doyoung stood up as I slung my bag again on my shoulders.

I asked Doyoung, "Can we hangout today? It's been a while"

He smiled, "Of course, how about the Chipotle near my house, at 4?" I nodded as we hugged once and then walked away to our classes.

I walked in the room, everybody turned to look at me. Some eyes were wide, some whispered and some just smiled at me.

Glancing at my usual seat, I saw someone sitting there,

Bae Jinyoung

God dammit he's in my class.

Glancing around for another seat, I saw Jeno, waving at me to sit next to him.

I started walking but suddenly paused,

Why is Haechan sitting alone?

He sat at the back of the class, alone.
Head down, bag sprawled on the floor next to him.

I smiled and waved, as I walked towards Jeno, Jaemin and Jisung sitting behind him.

"Guys?" I asked, they turned to look at me, "Why is Hyuck sitting alone?"

Jisung shrugged, "I tried to ask him, but he hushed me away"

I nodded and placed my bag on the floor, sitting next to Haechan.

"Hyuck?" I asked. He looked up and met my eyes. I was shocked when I saw them.

Red, swollen, dark circles, cheeks wet. He's been crying.

I sighed, "If you continue being like-"

"CONTINUE BEING LIKE WHAT? THE PIECE OF SHIT I AM? OR BE LIKE YOU WHO HAS NO FAULTS AT ALL? HUH? YOU MADE ME LIKE THIS! GET THAT THROUGH YOUR HEAD AND DON'T SHOW ME YOUR FACE AGAIN!"

I slightly flinched. The entire class jumped in shock too. A guy, who has always been someone who never yells at his friends, Just straight up screamed at his best friend.

I stayed silent as I looked down, staring at my feet.

Why do you even exist Kayla?

Look, you just ruined your friendship with your best friend.

"KAYLA" Jaemin yelled, but I didn't turn back.

Running out, I continued running downstairs, still holding my tears in.

I saw the girl's washroom. I hurriedly entered in a stall and closed the door.

My deep breaths continued as tears streamed down. They won't stop.

Me and Hyuck never fought in our nine years of friendship. We never even bickered. We knew each other so well, we understood each other even my slight difference in the eyes.

Suddenly, I can't breathe.

Fuck... I'm having a panic attack.

Coughing many times, trying to get air supply in my lungs, I harshly patted my chest many times.

Putting my hand in the pocket of my coat, I called the first person I was able to.

" J-J-J-J-Jaemin"

"Kayla" I heard his voice frankly saying,

"Where are you princess? Please tell-"

"Down...stairs...girl's...wash...room" I spoke between coughing and trying to breathe.

"KAYLA-"

The last thing I remember, before my vision turned black.